Waiting For A Star To Fall
by MyGirlCrais
Summary: Sequel to 'The Quick Fix'.
1. You should've bought a squirrel

Disclaimer: Farscape belongs to a lot of people, but I'm not one of them.  
  
Timing: Post ITLD. Sequel to 'History', 'Wounds' and 'The Quick Fix'.  
  
Rating: PG-13  
  
  
'Waiting For A Star To Fall'  
  
Chapter 1: You should've bought a squirrel   
  
Raylani Crais looked in the mirror and sighed. After twenty-two cycles, she thought, I should have learned not to sleep on wet hair. She opened her pot of pomade and began the lengthy process of taming her long, maniacally curly hair into something resembling a neat ponytail. She was sorely tempted, not for the first time, to hack it all off. It was really beginning to try her patience.   
  
Also not for the first time, she studied her reflection in the mirror as she worked. She knew that she'd inherited her mother's looks - the resemblance was obvious even to her - but it was signs of her father that she looked for. The hair was one (she wondered ruefully if he had as much trouble making it lie flat as she did), the dark eyes another. Her mother told her frequently that she sounded like him, especially when annoyed, but it was hard for her to judge. She had no idea what he was really like.   
  
Finally succeeding in fashioning her hair into its customary tight braid, she rose and pulled her black leather jacket from the back of her chair. Noticing a stain, probably the result of something she had leant in at the lab, she added it to her laundry pile instead and grabbed a fresh one from one of the storage compartments. Fastening it fully so that her appearance was suitably neat, she holstered the small pulse pistol she was permitted and headed out of her quarters. Her pace was fast along the corridor. If she was late for combat training, she'd be barred from it. She'd invested too much time in winning the privilege to risk losing it now.   
  
  
Reaching the training room, she quickly slipped into the ante-chamber and placed her jacket in its allotted space. Locking her pulse pistol away in its compartment, she took a deep breath and prepared, once again, to enter the lion's den. It was enough of an indignity being forced to train with a bunch of cadets, most at least four years her junior. What made it worse was that neither the cadets nor their instructor wanted her there. She wasn't Peacekeeper so, in their eyes, she didn't belong. She knew there were only two reasons why she hadn't been kicked out. One was the influence of her mother with Scorpius and the other was that she was damn good, and they knew it. She got the distinct impression that, despite his objections to having her in his class, Officer Kenves positively enjoyed it when she beat the dren out of his cockier cadets. That was fine. He'd use her for his benefit, she'd use him for hers and they'd get along. Most of the time.   
  
Of course he still had one up on her. There wasn't even a frelling server on the whole base that didn't know who her father was. To Peacekeepers everywhere, his name was an insult. And, since she had no rank, all she was known as was 'Crais'. Every time a new wave of cadets came to the base, they were quickly informed that she was the daughter of the renegade Bialar Crais. It didn't matter how much her mother praised him, it was pretty hard to live with every other person calling her father a traitor.   
  
But her mother had made it clear that her father was nothing if not strong willed and tenacious, so she'd live up to her name. No matter how many frelniks she had to stop herself from shooting.   
  
***   
  
Bialar Crais was seriously considering getting very, very drunk. He'd never been one to find solace in raslak, considering it a sign of weakness, but today was a special occasion.   
  
It had been exactly one cycle.   
  
Once cycle since he'd lost Carma and their new-born baby daughter. The wound from that had been vicious, he'd thought that nothing could make it worse. He'd been wrong. Finding out who he had lost them to had been like having acid injected straight into his bloodstream. Scorpius. He'd lost his family to Scorpius. He'd believed that he'd had his revenge when he'd destroyed his old command carrier and then, just when it seemed that Scorpius was working on their side, he'd double crossed Crais again. He was still furious with himself for not expecting it. He'd become too trusting since Carma had come into his life, begun to let his guard down. He had it up now with a vengeance, but it was too late.   
  
Across the table from him, in Talyn's galley, sat Aeryn Sun. She wasn't speaking to him. He wasn't speaking to her. They rarely spoke to each other at all these days, other than to give orders. She lived on Talyn with him, his dream come true. Inwardly, Crais laughed bitterly. What was it about fate? Either it didn't give you what you wanted, or it gave it to you when you didn't want it anymore. But, then again, it wasn't as if Aeryn were here because of him. She was here because of Crichton, because she didn't want to be somewhere that reminded her of him. There were less memories on Talyn than on Moya and Crais didn't care. He was back to living in the service of his own interests. He wouldn't make the same mistake again.   
  
  
He'd gone crazy trying to find them. Intercepted Peacekeeper traffic, tried informers, done everything he could possibly think of. No luck. They were dead, or as good as and he could only accept that. So now he was back to having no purpose again. Just surviving, with no thought to actually living.   
  
  
***   
  
Scorpius still marvelled at his good fortune. He sat in his office, watching the laboratories on the monitor in front of him. It didn't matter that Carma knew they were bugged, she didn't seem to let that knowledge affect her behaviour. Scorpius suspected that she found her work as absorbing as he did. Of course, it wouldn't be quite as absorbing for him if it hadn't given him the bargaining chip he needed to return to the Peacekeepers. High Command had known that his discovery was something they couldn't waste. And bringing the perfect scientist to conduct the project was an added bonus. She was valuable to him.   
  
And she knew it. She knew that he needed her here. That was why she could demand that her daughter was treated well. There seemed to be only two things she cared about, Raylani and the project. Since he'd brought her to the base almost a cycle ago, he'd never heard her mention Crais' name.   
  
Raylani Crais was an object of fascination for him. Raylani, his own mother's name. And her the daughter of a renegade and traitor. High Command would have dearly loved to have made an example of her, but Scorpius had prevented that. The day Raylani was harmed would be the day that Carma would forget his project. He could coerce, torture, threaten and it would make no difference. Her first loyalty was to her daughter and nothing would change that.   
  
Scorpius settled back in his chair, watching the figure on the screen move around the lab, oblivious to all but her work. He smiled evilly. Another fascinating creature.   
  
***   
  
He was watching her again, she knew it instinctively. She'd learned to live with it, she was well treated in every other way. She fascinated him, Raylani did too. Having them here was ecstasy for him. The perfect person to conduct his project and revenge on Crais as well. Carma was no fool, that was why she never mentioned him. Let Scorpius think she didn't care, it might take away a fraction of his pleasure. It wouldn't decrease hers.   
  
  
She had to admit that Raylani had thrived here. She was tough, just like her father and she put up with all the grief she got from the hoards of Peacekeepers infesting the base. Carma had always been careful to remind her that Peacekeeper opinion was not the only opinion. She knew that Raylani wanted to meet her father, but she survived without him. In fact there seemed to be only one person who really needed Crais in their life - her.   
  
In many ways being here had improved her too. She felt stronger than she ever had before, the old wounds beginning to heal over. Now she was left with only the gaping hole in her life left by Crais. After a cycle he could be anywhere, he probably wouldn't even realise that she was still alive. Even if she found him again, he'd probably have someone else in his life. So she was clinging to a dream. It was a dream she liked.   
  
Carma rolled her head around, trying to stretch out her neck. She had to admit that she loved working here. It felt good to have something concrete to do again. Frankly, she'd been a little bored on Talyn. Her project, or rather Scorpius' project, was all-absorbing and it was just the kind of work she liked. In fact, her life here was excellent.   
  
It was just missing Crais. 


	2. Accept no substitute

Chapter 2: Accept no substitute.  
  
Crais groaned inwardly. Even the soft lights of Talyn's interior hurt his head. Another sleep cycle over, another solar day beginning. Half-climbing, half-rolling out of bed, he stumbled in the direction of the bathroom, not bothering to conceal his nakedness.  
  
He hated waking up. His first thought on registering the body next to him was always of Carma, until the thought penetrated his foggy brain that Carma's hair wasn't black. First he'd had Aeryn on his ship, now he had her in his bed. Ever since the anniversary of his loss he'd spent every evening drinking, every night with an equally drunk Aeryn and every morning wishing he could sleep forever. He knew he should never have let himself turn to intoxicants. He might have known that one night wouldn't take the pain away.  
  
And Aeryn. Officer Aeryn Sun. His ultimate conquest. He'd spent countless hours recreating with her by now and he couldn't even say if he'd enjoyed them. He couldn't remember even one night for the last monen and he didn't want to. She wasn't Carma, and that meant that he didn't give a damn about who she was.  
  
Crais knew exactly what was to blame for this. Emotion. He and Aeryn, both of them, had been brought down by emotion. They'd both allowed themselves to care for other people, both lost those people and both been unable to cope with that loss. Losing Crichton once had thrown Aeryn back into Peacekeeper mode, her best defence mechanism. Losing him again, this time with finality, had pushed her over the edge. One bottle of Haroshian brandy and both of them had given up trying to deal with the pain any other way.  
  
They were both weak, pathetic, inferior. After all these cycles, all his most horrendous acts, Bialar Crais had finally succeeded in becoming what he hated most.  
  
Human.  
  
***  
  
"Crais!"  
  
"Yes sir!" Raylani replied automatically, turning back to face her instructor.  
  
"I wish to speak to you after class, privately," Officer Kenves said, lowering his voice slightly.   
  
"Yes sir!"  
  
Coming from anyone else she would have been suspicious of that order, but she'd come to trust Kenves over the three monens she'd spent in his class. He was a demanding instructor who turned out first class soldiers, but he was fair. All in all, he was the only Peacekeeper she trusted.  
  
The class passed much as usual. The other cadets ignored her as much as possible, even when she was fighting them. Part of it was prejudice, part of it was jealousy and part of it was anger. They despised non-Peacekeepers, they envied her obvious prowess in training and they all hated her for acting like she was superior.  
  
Actually she didn't think she was. Her mother advised caution in forming any relationships with Peacekeepers, admitting the irony in what she was saying. From her refusal to recreate with any of the officers who had approached her, Raylani Crais had become a serious challenge. She was quite aware that there was a betting pool going and that the stakes were high. It seemed that the man who got into her bed first would be revered as a god, a fact which made it ever more necessary that she keep her distance. Add to that her mother's undeniable influence with Scorpius and her father's history and she was just about unlikeable to any Peacekeeper. Which, when there is no-one else, is not as desirable as it might first appear.  
  
After class she remained behind, intensely curious as to what Kenves wanted to speak to her about and half-wondering what she would do if he did suggest a quiet drink in his quarters. She'd discovered that it could take anything from harsh words to a swift panthak jab to make a male realise that no actually meant no. As it happened, her first instinct had been right. She didn't need to break any body parts.  
  
"Crais," he said, getting straight to the point as usual, "you shouldn't be in this class. I should have sent you into officer training by now."  
  
Raylani nodded, it was nothing she didn't already know. She'd seen plenty of cadets less skilled than her move up.  
  
"Unfortunately," Kenves continued, scowling, "Lieutenant Hessan won't take you. But I assume that you guessed that?"  
  
"Yes sir."  
  
"So I propose to teach you myself."  
  
"Sir?" Raylani asked, looking up in surprise.  
  
"Unofficially, I'm afraid. I want you to assist me in training the new cadets and I'll train you in my off hours in return. Officially, you'll still be in the cadet class. Is that understood?"  
  
"Yes sir!" Raylani answered, expression carefully controlled.  
  
"You're good, Crais," Kenves added. "If you were a normal cadet I'd predict commando school for you. But...."  
  
"Thank you, sir, for the opportunity," Raylani said. Neither of them needed to elaborate on the situation. She was to be kept down as much as possible and there was nothing that anyone could do about it. Even Scorpius didn't bother *that* much with her. And, besides, she didn't particularly want to be in his dept.  
  
***  
  
Carma's heartbeat had just doubled in speed and intensity. Every instinct told her that she was on to something. That she might finally have cracked the puzzle that had kept her up for countless nights this last monen. She wasn't finished, but she could just see the finish line in the distance. Her holy grail.  
  
Scorpius' revelation had left her stunned at first. She could still hear his calm, cold voice as he'd explained. As he'd said the words that had dismantled her entire identity.  
  
"Three hundred cycles ago, the Peacekeepers...attempted a new line of defence against the Scarrans. A talented medical technician began attempts to alter the genetic codes of Sebaceans...so that they would grow heat glands. Low heat tolerance is the greatest weakness of the Sebacean race. If we could take steps to raise that tolerance...it would be one more point in our favour, one more step towards making the Peacekeepers the supreme military force in the galaxy."  
  
There he'd paused for a moment, studying her reaction before he continued.  
  
"The experiments were taking place aboard only one command carrier, an extremely foolish mistake it is true. However, at the time, no-one but its Captain truly understood the importance of the work that was being done. Peacekeeper High Command were not optimistic about the project's success and focused their efforts on more obvious advantages. The initial reports on the project...suggested that it was progressing well. Then...the carrier disappeared."  
  
He'd paused again.  
  
"Wreckage was eventually found, but no survivors. It appeared that the entire crew had been killed and the ship looted beyond value. The official judgement...was that the genetic experiments had created a virus which had resulted in the deaths of the entire crew. All further experiments were banned and the records were closed. However, there was also a theory that the crew were not killed. That the experiments...were in fact a success. This theory...stated that many of the crew had successfully developed heat glands. They had mutinied, killed their fellow officers through overexposure to heat and left...to start a new life. What I believe...is that you are one of the descendants of those officers. Your people...are in fact genetically altered Sebaceans, proof that the experiments were successful. And I intend for you to prove it all over again."  
  
Learning that she was really Sebacean, that her entire culture had been founded by Peacekeeper renegades, that she wasn't who she thought she was, had been an incredible shock. Add to that the stress of being taken away from Talyn, from Crais, from the only family she had left. Add to that Raylani's transformation. It was a wonder she hadn't completely broken down. Yet, somehow, she hadn't. She'd grown stronger instead. In a strange way, this had all been a blessing.  
  
But if she could really end this project successfully, then she and Raylani could leave this base and go home. And, despite every benefit of her position here, she wanted to go home. Home was where the heart was. And that was with Crais.  
  
***  
  
Captain Braca was Raylani's least favourite Peacekeeper. Probably because he was the embodiment of every value and regulation that the Peacekeepers cherished. Had they encoded the procedure manuals into his DNA they couldn't have done a better job. He was the perfect second in command. He served without question, but he served the title not the person. Change the leader and he didn't even blink. Follow orders. It doesn't matter who gives them as long as they're a winner. Always back the winner.  
  
He'd served her father, she knew that. Then Scorpius. Then someone called Grayza who she wasn't familiar with. Fiercely loyal until you were knocked off the top spot, then just as fiercely opposed to you. Apparently though, Grayza hadn't worked out too well. And Braca, she had to give him credit for that, knew when to cut his losses.  
  
At least he did in his career. He didn't seem to when it came to her. She had a feeling that recreating with the daughter of his former Captain was a chance he couldn't turn down. He'd pursued her relentlessly since his arrival at the base. To be honest, she'd half expected Scorpius to kill him before he'd been there a solar day. Double-crossing anyone was never very wise, approaching that person to say sorry was like jumping into a tank of flesh-eating junja fish. Insane and suicidal. She still didn't know how he'd survived.  
  
Braca was really the only one she had to fight off on a daily basis. Most gave up after one try, others made several attempts before they got tired of trekking down to the medilab to have their injuries repaired. Braca was like a fly. Relatively harmless, but you just couldn't get rid of him.  
  
Except, it seemed she had. He hadn't been near her in at least three solar days. It was liberating...but also slightly depressing. She must be insane. Completely insane. But she was sick of being celibate all the time. She was a woman, she had needs and who knew when they'd get off this base? It could be cycles before she met anyone who wasn't a Peacekeeper. Fine, she'd admit it, she was quite willing to frell the next man that asked her. Any man. Especially him.  
  
***  
  
Like Raylani thought, Braca did know when to cut his losses. It had taken him a while to realise that Grayza wasn't going to benefit him, but once he had he'd taken swift action. Frankly he hadn't been sure if he would survive being under Scorpius' command once again, but he had. Scorpius had either decided that he had value, or was just biding his time. Either way, it would benefit him in the short term. He wanted his name involved with this project. High Command must have been confident of its success to reinstate Scorpius and that was good enough for him.  
  
That the woman working on Scorpius' project was supposedly involved with Crais had surprised him. She certainly was a change from Larell. Softer, better looking (at least in his judgement) and a good deal less naive. She didn't trust Peacekeepers much. She did her work, Braca suspected that she enjoyed her work, but she didn't involve herself any other way in life on the station. And she never so much as glanced at any of the males.  
  
Unfortunately, her daughter seemed to be following her lead. Braca too was aware of the betting pool. He didn't consider it particularly significant. His motives were personal. This was Bialar Crais' daughter and if Crais ever found out that Braca had recreated with her he'd be insane with rage. That wasn't the Peacekeeper reaction, but Braca knew all too well that Crais' ideas on family ties had never conformed to PK codes. It was, quite simply, too good an opportunity to miss.  
  
Now if he could only convince her of that....  
  
***  
  
Crais shoved the airlock door closed and punched in the sequence that would jettison the contents into space. No more intoxicants. Not for him, not for Aeryn. He would not continue being so weak and he knew that Aeryn should not have to suffer the indignity of it either. So he had nothing. He should be used to that by now.  
  
Crichton's death, before Crais' world had been ripped apart, when Scorpius had still been locked safely in a holding cell on Moya, had shocked all of them. The headaches he'd complained of, becoming increasingly severe, had finally led to Carma insisting on examining him. Crichton had resisted, being none too fond of having people poking about in his brain by that time, but had finally agreed. The tumour she had detected had made even a seasoned doctor such as Carma go white. They'd located a diagnostician because Carma didn't want to risk doing it on Moya with the limited facilities at their disposal. She had operated, she had tried, she had failed. And Crichton had left this part of the galaxy as suddenly as he had entered it.  
  
Aeryn had almost died with him.  
  
At that time, Crais had been so involved with the impending birth of his daughter that it had never occurred to him to ask her to join them. But once Carma was gone, he'd made the suggestion...and Aeryn had agreed immediately. For the first time it hadn't been because he wanted anything from her. Maybe it was because he wanted to leave Moya immediately, but recognised that Aeryn's growing attachment to Talyn was all she had left. Maybe it was because he could only face seeing someone else as miserable as him. Maybe it was just because he'd guessed that she wanted to and hadn't cared enough to prevent it.  
  
It was ironic. Over the last cycle he'd finally fulfilled the fantasy he'd harboured for two before that. And he'd found it empty. He didn't want Aeryn. The idea had appealed, but the reality didn't suit him. He knew exactly who he wanted and she was gone. The fantasy was over and he had nothing to replace it.  
  
But no more intoxicants. If it came to it, it was better to die than to live to become pathetic as well as bitter and twisted.  
  
***  
  
It really was an accident. He'd never planned on meeting her. He'd never expected her to be in that place at that time. The base was huge, the chances of their paths crossing minuscule. And he'd fallen into step beside her automatically, surprised when she didn't either speed up or drop back.  
  
So they walked towards her quarters. Her quarters were on the way to his quarters and he was going to his quarters. After a long, hard shift Braca was looking forward to getting some sleep. Scorpius seemed to be doing his utmost to prevent him sleeping, eating or resting. Obviously some subtle form of revenge.  
  
"Would you like to come in?"  
  
The invitation, issued as they reached her quarters in a tone that she might use to ask if he could pass the purrick sauce, left him absolutely stunned.  
  
"What?" he asked, certain he had heard wrong.  
  
She repeated it, making Braca wonder seriously if he had fallen asleep already and was either dreaming or sleep-walking. She stood there, looking expectant. Finally deciding that this was neither a dream nor a hallucination, Braca managed a nod.  
  
So he went in. And didn't come out for a very long time. 


	3. By any means necessary

Chapter 3: By any means necessary.  
  
"I can't stay."  
  
"I didn't ask you to."  
  
"But you want me to."  
  
"Not particularly."  
  
Raylani sat up in bed, pulling the sheet up around her as she did so, so that she was on a level with him.   
  
"It's just recreation, Braca."  
  
Shouldn't he be the one saying that?  
  
"I doubt that either of your parents would see it that way."  
  
Raylani got a look on her face that made him shudder, because it was one he'd seen too many times before from her father.  
  
"My father's not here, so you can't tell him and my mother isn't that much of a hypocrite. If she can fall in love with an ex-PK, I can frell a current one without fear of recrimination. It's sex. I want it, you want it, so we have it. And you're as good as anyone, at least you didn't do it solely to win a bet."  
  
He hadn't thought that she knew about that.  
  
"So anyway, you can't stay, I don't want you to stay, so we don't have a problem. Leave, come back later if you want. If not, there's an end to it."  
  
This was not going the way he'd intended it to. Did the entire Crais family exist to make his life difficult?  
  
***  
  
"Hey," Carma said warmly when Raylani came into the lab. "What happened?"  
  
"Huh?" Raylani asked, confused.  
  
"You look like you're in a good mood," Carma replied. "I thought there might be a reason."  
  
"No reason," Raylani answered, sitting down beside her. "What did you want to talk about?"  
  
Carma grinned, obviously in a good mood herself. "I think I'm there," she said.  
  
The patented Crais what-are-you-talking-about look flashed over Raylani's face. "Ah," she said. "Where's that exactly?"  
  
"The project," Carma prompted her. "I think I might have cracked it. Actually I thought that before, but I didn't want to get your hopes up. We still have to do tests, but I think we might be able to leave soon."  
  
Raylani paused. "Do you really believe that Scorpius will just allow us to leave?" she asked.  
  
Carma's smile faded. "All the time we've been here, I've never let myself doubt that," she said. "But...I don't know."  
  
"And do you think that we'll really find my father? He could be anywhere, he could be dead, he could...." she didn't finish that thought.  
  
"He could have found someone else?" Carma asked, seriously. "Yes, he could have done. But he's your father and I love him and I won't believe that until I hear it from his own mouth. We'll find him...somehow and you'll get to meet him and then...we'll see what happens."  
  
Raylani looked thoughtful. "You really love him don't you?"  
  
Carma smiled affectionately. "Honey, if I didn't neither of us would be here today."  
  
"Even though he was a Peacekeeper once?"  
  
"You can't control who you fall in love with. And a bad past doesn't necessarily mean a bad present. Why? You haven't gone and fallen for a PK have you?" Carma said, obviously joking.  
  
"No," Raylani replied. "No...I'm not that stupid." Then, abruptly. "What was my father like when I was born?"  
  
"You mean how did he act?"  
  
Raylani nodded. Carma began to laugh to herself as the memories washed over her.  
  
"Panicked is probably the best word," she said, trying to control her laughter. "I think he managed to get through the whole pregnancy without actually realising that he'd be a father at the end of it. I remember...." she broke off, mirth turning into affection. "I remember the first night. I was still in the medilab on Moya and he stayed there all night. I woke up about halfway through the sleep cycle and...he was sitting there with you in his arms, just gazing at you like you might disappear if he looked away. I don't think he ever got used to the idea that you were really there before...you weren't."  
  
Being unusually affectionate, Raylani leant her head on her mother's shoulder. "We'll get back to him, won't we?"  
  
Carma kissed the top of her head.  
  
"We will. No matter how long it takes."  
  
***  
  
Carma surveyed the site that greeted her and wrinkled her nose. If they didn't need supplies so badly they'd never have stopped here. The whole planet was the rubbish dump of the universe by the look of it. It was dirty, hot, crowded and it stank. Raylani's first response when they'd stepped out of their craft had been to empty her stomach on the ground and it had taken all Carma's self-control not to follow suit. It was almost enough to make her wish that they'd never left the base.  
  
They had been allowed to leave. Trials had proved successful and her work was done. They'd been given identity papers, currency and the modified transport pod that Scorpius had stolen to bring them to the base in the first place. Fortunately neither of them were innocents anymore. Carma had bartered virtually everything they possessed at the first opportunity, replacing id chips, transport and anything else she could think of that tracking devices could have been implanted into. By this time, the only things they still possessed that Scorpius could be tracking were themselves, and there was precious little that they could do about that. Neither of them really believed that their dealings with Scorpius were over, but only time would reveal if they were right.  
  
So they were off, on their journey to reunite with Talyn, Moya and all the people that meant. It was, Carma thought, more than a little frightening. For most of her life she'd never left the planet she'd been born on. When she had, it had been with the protection offered by a leviathan gunship and a man with countless cycles' experience in survival. Now she was the one trying to keep herself and her daughter alive. She only hoped that she was equal to the task.  
  
It had been only two weekens since they had left the base, but still the lack of leads to find Talyn was humbling. It had seemed so easy, leave the base and find Crais. Now, realising just what an impossible task it was, she was beginning to get scared. They could wander the uncharted territories for the rest of their lives and never find him. The thought was like a weight on her chest, making it hard to breath. She pushed it from her mind.  
  
They split up. It was a stupid thing to do, she knew that, but they needed to get their supplies and get out as soon as possible. Fortunately, whatever this planet's other failings, its supplies were plentiful and its prices reasonable. She found everything that she was looking for and returned to their small craft at the ground dock.  
  
All that was waiting for her there was a small piece of paper, written in Raylani's unmistakable hand. As she read it, all the breath left her body and she sat down before she blacked out.  
  
'Mother. I can't go back with you, I have to leave. I can't explain now, but if we meet again someday I will then and I hope you'll understand. I'll survive. I hope you find my father again. Raylani.'  
  
She knew it was genuine. Kidnappers in the uncharted territories didn't leave notes. They took and left, they knew you wouldn't have a hope of finding them. Confused, shocked and more frightened than ever, Carma let her calm facade crack. Tears rolling down her face, she wrapped her arms around herself and broke down.  
  
Not so very far away, Raylani Crais wiped the tears that stubbornly insisted on coming from her eyes as she walked rapidly, keeping her head down. She'd meant what she said, she had to do this. She would rather take her chances out here than admit the truth. Her mother might understand, but her father - if they found him - never would.  
  
He'd never accept that his first grandchild had been fathered by a man he hated as much as Captain Braca.  
  
***  
  
Crais' heart was heavy as he kept his mind firmly fixed on the diagnostics he was running. Now firmly sober and hating every minute of it, he had nothing to take his mind off his pain. And, to make matters worse, he now felt bitterly ashamed. If Carma were still alive somewhere, what would she think of him recreating with Aeryn? He suspected that she would understand if he had found someone else, but not Aeryn. She was too close to home and there was too much history between them. For a microt, he almost hoped that she never came back to find out what a mess he'd made of his life since she'd been pulled from it. Almost.  
  
Aeryn had chosen to return to Moya when they had last met up with her. Now sober herself, he suspected that she felt she'd dishonoured Crichton's memory as much as he felt he'd dishonoured Carma's. They'd made no formal parting, it was as if the last tie had been dissolved. They had nothing more to say to each other.  
  
Now alone again, he'd begun to miss the companionship offered by the transponder. He still stuck to his decision not to take it again, but it was difficult. Especially since it meant that he couldn't communicate with Talyn directly. It meant wasting precious microts giving orders instead of acting himself.  
  
When Talyn signalled to him, he had to study the sensor readouts to discover what Talyn was trying to draw his attention to. It was a small craft, not one of any style he was familiar with. It was about the same size as a transport pod and didn't appear armed. Having obviously noticed Talyn, it neither turned nor ignored him. It appeared to manoeuvre as if it wanted to dock. He tried hailing the occupant, but received no reply. Curious, although wary, he allowed it to dock. Grabbing his pulse pistol and giving Talyn strict instructions not to open the bay door before he arrived, he strode quickly down the corridors. He just hoped he didn't regret this decision.  
  
As the bay doors opened, he went in, weapon at the ready. The sight that met him made the pistol fall from his limp fingers and hit the floor. Fortunately, he'd put the safety on.  
  
"Hello," Carma said simply.  
  
***  
  
He was still looking at her, she could feel his eyes on her. Pretending not to notice, she passed a hand briefly over the tiny swell of her stomach. So she'd survive, would she? Yes, but she'd never realised how.  
  
At least he was Sebacean. Not that Peacekeeper ideas of irreversible contamination had ever really penetrated, but there was comfort in familiarity. She knew what to expect. Plus no claws, or fins or any of the other horrors that she'd seen in the brief few weeks she'd been working here. With luck, he'd be no threat to her or her baby, whatever he wanted to do.  
  
So she was a server. Officially serving drinks to the men of varying degrees of disrepute who frequented this bar. Unofficially performing other duties as well. Although how unofficial it could be when everybody knew about it and she didn't have a choice, she didn't know. She'd been captured and brought here as a slave. She'd work until no one would have her anymore, no way out.   
  
Still, there was no use in crying about it. This male didn't look quite as hardened as some of the others she had seen and she'd survive it. Really, in different circumstances, she might have thought him quite handsome. He was likely an ex-PK. Black leathers, long hair pulled back into a tail. But a rough one, not a neat Peacekeeper-issue one. Tall, well built. Hopefully wealthy. And he'd been watching her all night, with the most curious look on his face.  
  
She caught his eye for a microt and he signalled her to approach. Sighing and squaring her shoulders, she moved towards his table in a dimly-lit corner of the bar.  
  
"Can I do anything for you, sir?" she asked. Might as well get it over with.  
  
He leaned forward. He seemed to be studying her face. "What's your name?" he asked.  
  
She stiffened. That was an unusual and unwelcome question.  
  
"Whatever you wish to call me." That seemed to be the most suitable response.  
  
He looked startled by her response. "You look familiar, I just want to know your name."  
  
Frell, this one was acting like he was trying to seduce her. Well it was money not love that bought her favours these days and it would get him nowhere.  
  
"Charm will not get you anywhere," she said, calmly but firmly. "If you are not interested in purchasing anything, I will leave you."  
  
He caught her arm as she turned away. Raylani forcibly restrained herself. Instinct told her to attack, but she couldn't risk the beating it would mean. She had her child to consider.  
  
"Look, I'm not giving you a line here," the man said, trying again. "Seriously, will you please tell me your name?"  
  
Deciding that it wasn't important enough to start a fight over, she answered.  
  
"It's...Raylani Crais."  
  
The man stared at her, then whistled under his breath. "Any relation to Bialar?" he asked.  
  
"He's my father," Raylani answered, astonishment loosening her tongue.  
  
"And your mother...is Raylani Carma? Or maybe Carma Crais by now?"  
  
Now astonishment turned to fright. "How do you know that?" she asked, trying to move away. He still had her wrist in a tight grip.  
  
"I won't hurt you," he said. "I know both your parents, I'm a friend. My name is John Crichton." 


	4. TOW Everybody Finds Out

Chapter 4: The One Where Everybody Finds Out.  
  
For possibly the first time in his life, Bialar Crais was lost for words. Talyn was not. The bay lights flashed excitedly and Carma turned smiling eyes to the ceiling. "Hi Talyn," she said softly, "I'm home."  
  
Since Crais didn't seem to be planning to move any time soon, she moved slowly towards him, drinking in the sight she'd waited all this time to see again. She stopped when she was standing in front of him, their bodies not quite touching. Reaching up, she slowly trailed one hand down his cheek. For a few microts, she wasn't sure that he would respond. Then she felt a hand slide up her arm and cover her own. Then his other hand on the small of her back, pulling her closer as he bent his head to kiss her. She happily wound her arms around his neck, melting into his embrace as she returned the kiss.  
  
"I didn't know if you were still alive," he murmured into her ear as he held her close, revelling in the feel of her body against his once more.  
  
"I didn't know if you were," Carma murmured back.  
  
"How did you escape?" Crais asked softly.  
  
"I didn't. He let us go."  
  
That made Crais stiffen. He pulled back to look at her, his hands on her upper arms.  
  
"I know Bialar," Carma said, before he asked the question. "But what was I going to do, stay? I got rid of the ship he gave us, although that does mean that Talyn can't have his transport pod back, the ident chips, everything. Unless I've got a homing device under my skin, he won't find us. And yes, I will scan for one when I can."  
  
"You did well," Crais said gruffly. "I am...glad that you're back."  
  
Carma smiled. "I'm glad to be back," she said. "So...how is everything around here?"  
  
His attempt to forget what he had learnt and return to Peacekeeper mode had obviously failed, because in those days he wouldn't have understood that question.  
  
"No," he said.  
  
"No," she answered, hopefully.  
  
"No," he repeated, "and never. No one but you."  
  
A smile tried to take over her face. "Why Bialar," she said softly, "that may be the most romantic thing you've ever said to me. And I only had to get kidnapped for a cycle or so to hear it."  
  
Crais looked slightly sheepish. "I...promise that it will not always take so much," he said.   
  
And then he asked her the question she'd been dreading.  
  
"Where is Raylani?"  
  
The tears that she'd thought she was all out of threatened to start again. "She's...she's gone Bialar."  
  
Crais drew a ragged breath. "She's...dead."  
  
"I don't know," Carma said helplessly, "not when I last saw her, but she could be anywhere by now and I don't know if we'll ever see her again."  
  
"Someone has taken her," Crais said, silently vowing to kill that unknown person.  
  
Carma shook her head. "No, no, she...chose to leave. I just...don't know why."  
  
"She cannot be...even two cycles old," Crais said, now confused as well as angry, "how could she choose to leave?"  
  
Carma sighed, this was going to be hard. "Bialar, a lot has happened that you don't know about. And most of it has to do with Raylani. It's going to take a while to explain."  
  
Crais met her eyes. "Then begin," he said.  
  
***  
  
"I've heard my mother mention you," Raylani said. "But you're supposed to be...well, dead."  
  
Crichton groaned and sat back in his seat, releasing her wrist as he let his head fall back to rest on the seat. "Well yeah, I'm supposed to be dead. Hell your father was supposed to be dead when he blew up the damn command carrier, but he wasn't. And I'm supposed to be dead a thousand times over. I was supposed to be dead when I got shot out here, I was supposed to be dead when Crais was hunting me down, I was supposed to be dead in the Aurora Chair and I was supposed to be dead just about every frelling day in my insane life. But I'm not. I've been...mostly dead. And now they've given me the magic seed, or mushroom, or whatever the hell it was so I can go rescue the Princess frelling Buttercup."  
  
And then his head snapped back to her. "And you," he said, "are not supposed to be this old. Hell, it's been...what...one cycle and a few monens since you were born. How the frell can you be this old? And what in the UTs are you doing here?"  
  
She looked away. "It's a long story."  
  
Crichton looked around and noticed the bar manager looking closely at them. "Well then, tell your boss or whoever he is that I'm your customer for tonight so he'll quit giving us the evil eye and we'll go talk. You gotta room somewhere?"  
  
She nodded, still not completely trusting him, but feeling she didn't have much to lose.  
  
"So lead the way Ms Crais," he said, throwing back the last of his drink and grabbing his jacket from the seat next to him.  
  
And, after a microt's hesitation, she did.  
  
***  
  
"Almost as soon as we got there," Carma said, trying to find the best point to begin at, "Raylani got sick. She caught...something. To tell you the truth, I'm still not entirely convinced that it was natural. It was pretty amazing for a virus but...anyway. Her body began producing incredibly high levels of growth hormones. She..." she broke off as the memories flooded back. "She went through her entire childhood and adolescence in less than three weekens. You...could sit there and watch it. We had to put her on a life support machine and feed her nutrients that way because it was the only way to get them into her body fast enough. Even then she was suffering desperate malnutrition. If it had lasted even one more day...."  
  
Carma looked helplessly at Crais. "She was a one monen old baby in the body of an adult. We tried to stop the process and we succeeded, but we couldn't reverse what had already been done. She couldn't do anything for herself and she couldn't have lived like that. So...Scorpius suggested...an alternative."  
  
She sighed. "The Peacekeepers had been working on...memory replacement. What better tool? Instead of declaring soldiers irreversibly contaminated you just wipe it from their brains. With Raylani...they built her a memory. And they did a good job. She seems...normal...and not Peacekeeper. She remembers twenty-two cycles of life when she's only had one. She knows who I am and she remembers a childhood with me in it, living on the base. But...I don't share her memories. We can't talk about the past because I don't remember it...and I still don't know what they might have programmed into her."  
  
Crais sat, stunned, trying to process this. His daughter was twenty-two cycles old and remembered goodness knows what. And...she was lost.  
  
"Where is she now?" he asked weakly.  
  
"We stopped at a commerce planet a few weekens ago, not long after we'd left the base. We split up to get what we needed - I know we shouldn't have, but she knows how to take care of herself and we were in a hurry - and when I came back all I found was a note saying that she had to leave, that she couldn't come back with me."  
  
"You do not believe it to be false?" Crais asked, knowing the answer even as he said it.  
  
Carma shook her head. "If she'd been captured they wouldn't have bothered to explain. She'd just be gone. She...chose to leave and I have no idea why."  
  
Crais did the only thing he could do in the circumstances. He pulled her into his embrace, trying to comfort her and sort through the jumble of information and emotions in his head at the same time. It was an impossible task. Once again, she'd managed to turn his world upside down. And, this time, he wasn't sure that he would ever regain his balance.  
  
***  
  
"So that's the story," Raylani said.  
  
Crichton sat across from her, his mouth open. "Man," he said, shaking his head, "just when I think that I've heard everything."  
  
"Your turn," she said abruptly. "How can you be alive?"  
  
Crichton picked up a small food cube and popped it in his mouth before replying. He chewed slowly, taking his time to find the right place to begin.  
  
"You know the back story right?"  
  
Raylani shook her head.   
  
"I had brain cancer," he said, matter-of-factly. "They took me to a diagnostician who operated and tried to save me. She failed and I died. She put me in stasis for the funeral and...left me there. She promised to bury me herself, but she didn't. Then, a few monens later, she dug me out and got this other guy to fix me. Then she revived me. So...I'm alive."  
  
"That sounds just slightly far-fetched," Raylani commented, dryly.  
  
"Sweetheart my whole life has been far-fetched ever since I got blasted into this part of the universe. I've just learned to accept it."  
  
"So what are you doing now?"  
  
"Not much," Crichton answered, taking a slug of raslak from his mug. "I thought about going back to find Aeryn...but she's already had to see me once after watching me die. I'm not sure she could take a second time. So basically I'm just bumming around the uncharteds, trying to stay out of trouble. Mostly failing on that count, but that figures. What about you? Why are you out here, why didn't you go home with your mom?"  
  
"Because I can't tell them about the baby," Raylani said flatly.  
  
Crichton raised an eyebrow. "You think mommy and daddy Crais are going to kick you out for getting knocked up without a ring on your finger? Or a bonding tattoo, whatever. I hate to break this to you, but they're not even bonded themselves. I really doubt that they're gonna care."  
  
"It's not the child, it's the father."  
  
"Ah," Crichton said, "who is it?"  
  
"I'm not going to tell you!" Raylani said, looking at him like he was mad. "Not when I wouldn't tell them."  
  
"Is it Scorpius?"  
  
Raylani grimaced. "Certainly not."  
  
"Then believe me...they ain't gonna care."  
  
"I can't go back now," Raylani said simply.  
  
"So what if we go back together?" Crichton said, with a cheer that she knew was at least partly liquid in origin. "If Aeryn survives the heart attack she might even have me back, we can stun 'em together."  
  
"I can't leave, I'm contracted to the bar manager, Ranun," Raylani pointed out.  
  
Crichton shrugged. "I've got some currency, I'll buy you out. Failing that I'll shoot you out. Either way, we'll get out of here and go find Moya and Talyn. If nothing else, I wanna see the look on Crais' face when he finds out that he's gonna be a grandad.  
  
***  
  
They'd met up with Moya again to share the good news. Jool had been ecstatic to see her friend again and she and Carma had done a thorough search for homing beacons under the skin. Since then, Carma had been strangely quiet.  
  
She didn't beat around the bush. When Crais walked into their quarters that evening, she got straight to the point.  
  
"You recreated with Aeryn."  
  
It was not a question. Crais was caught completely unprepared. He and Aeryn had made a silent agreement not to mention this to her, or anyone for that matter. That only left one suspect....  
  
"Talyn," he said.  
  
"Nope," Carma said. "He didn't tell me anything."  
  
"Then how did you.... Carma, I swear to you, there is nothing between us," Crais said, seeing himself losing her once again and trying to hold on.  
  
"I know," Carma said. "That's how I know. There's always been this...sub-text...between you. Some...unfinished business. Now there's nothing."  
  
She moved slightly closer to him, arms folded across her chest. "I got Talyn to show me some of his surveillance logs. You were drinking, so was she. A lot. For a monen."  
  
"I..." Crais started to explain himself and then realised that he couldn't. "I'm sorry," he said instead.  
  
"Like I said," Carma continued, "whatever this thing between you was...it seems to have gone. And you thought I was dead and you were drunk and upset and completely out of your head by the look of it. So I guess it's understandable. Even...excusable."  
  
Crais looked up in surprise. To be honest, he hadn't been confident of surviving this conversation. He smiled.  
  
"It still hurts," Carma said, wiping the smile from his face. "It hurts that you didn't have the faith to wait until you had seen a body to give up on me. I never gave up on you. And it hurts that it was her. And I'm not all that sure if I want to be in love with a man who hurts me like this."  
  
Crais' heart dropped like a stone all the way down to his boots. You wouldn't have imagined it from his relatively calm exterior.  
  
"Do you...wish to leave?" he asked, not quite managing to keep his voice steady.  
  
Carma sighed. "I said I wasn't sure if I wanted to be in love with you. Unfortunately...I don't have a choice. I've been in love with you since we met and I think it's pretty clear that that's never going to change. So...I'm going to forgive you. Just...not yet. Ask in a few weekens, love will probably have overruled common sense by then. It usually does."  
  
With that she strode out of their quarters, not looking at him. Crais watched her go. Conscience-stricken because, once again, he felt that he'd really let someone down.  
  
***  
  
Raylani stood, staring out of the window of the room they had taken for the night. They'd got off the planet alright and had now stopped somewhere else for supplies. Crichton's craft was small, but it moved okay.   
  
She didn't know if she would ever find her family. She didn't know what would happen next cycle, next monen, next weeken, even next solar day. But she knew that she had to go home. Crichton was right. No matter who the father of her child was, it deserved to know its grandparents.   
  
The child within her kicked solidly. It agreed. 


	5. It's a small world, er, galaxy

Chapter 5: It's a small world...er...galaxy.  
  
"We need fuel for our ship, but you can't travel all the way to the city. I need a place to leave you."  
  
"Leave me?" Raylani echoed, tired and grumpy and annoyed over his choice of words. "I am not a safe deposit."  
  
"Don't give me that look," Crichton said, shuddering. "I hate that look. Your father gives me that look. Damn you would be so nice to look at if you weren't so...so...Crais-like!"   
  
He had gotten on her last nerve. She drew herself up to her full height, which wasn't much shorter than Crichton, managing to look threatening in spite of being heavily pregnant and glared at him. "Do not," she said, the tension evident around her mouth, "make insulting remarks about my family. Unless you wish yourself and your mivonks to part company very shortly."  
  
He knew that look too. It was a bad look.  
  
"Okay," Crichton said, trying for once to calm rather than ignite a Crais' anger. "But seriously, you can't travel into the city in your condition. You heard, it's a three day journey by road each way, it'll be rough and it's too dangerous for you. I'll go, I'll find some fuel and be back in a weeken. This isn't like the commerce planets we've been on, these people are farmers. I wouldn't say that you're safe here, but it's better for you to get some rest."  
  
Raylani tried to run her fingers through her hair. It didn't work. The action interfered badly with the tightly woven 'French braid' that Crichton had wrestled her hair into. She sighed, resisting the temptation to carry on their argument. Despite everything she had said, the idea of staying here was extremely appealing. Now a solid four monens pregnant, the dream of finding her parents had been replaced by one of a world where she could still see her feet. She felt fat and hot, and the last thing she wanted to do was trek off to the nearest city in search of more fuel. She and Crichton had both hurled a volley of curse words at the trader who had sold them the last lot, after they discovered that the last container had been tainted and was utterly useless. They'd been forced to land here, since the next commerce planet was too far away, and, without more fuel, they'd be stuck.  
  
"Okay, fine," she said, trying to sound reluctant. "If this guy will take me, I'll stay here."  
  
Crichton looked up at the house in front of them. The village leader, whose name they still didn't know, had disappeared inside almost as soon as the door had been opened and was, he assumed, explaining their situation to the owner of the house. Crichton had only caught a glimpse of the man who had answered the door, but there was something nagging at him all the same. The strangest feeling of deja vu.  
  
Suddenly the door opened and the two men returned. Crichton got his second look at the man they hoped would offer Raylani a room. He was tall and broad, with iron grey hair drawn back into a tight tail. And a goatee beard.  
  
A memory suddenly jumped up and slapped Crichton round the face. One of Maldis' castle and the visions he had seen there. "Holy frell," he blurted out, "that's Crais' father!"  
  
***  
  
The last three monens had been a trial. Carma had done as she had predicted and moved back into his quarters after a few weekens, but she'd still been...distant. Still, at least she was talking to him and things were almost back to normal. Raylani's absence obviously weighed heavily on her though. They'd begun to search for her, starting by going back to the planet where she'd left. It had taken several weekens just to get a hint of where she might be. Fortunately, at the next planet, someone had been able to identify her. She'd told them that Raylani had left the planet accompanied by a Sebacean male. Further questioning had resulted in her admitting that Raylani had been 'purchased' by the male, from the one who had brought her to this planet. That news had made Crais' eyes darken. Since then they'd made every effort to locate her, attempting to chart the most likely route of her 'owner' from commerce planet to commerce planet. They'd had some success, but the trail led on and on. They hadn't remained anywhere long enough to be caught up to. At this rate, they might never find her.  
  
Crais had been standing, stock still, looking out of the viewscreen for a full half arn when he felt the arms slide round his waist. He turned, surprised at her expression of affection. They'd been severely lacking over the last few monens. She didn't object to being pulled round into his embrace either.  
  
"Bialar," Carma said, looking up at him, "we'll find her, won't we?"  
  
Crais knew the answer he was expected to give, even when he was starting to lose all hope. Memories of his relentless pursuit of Crichton moved back to the surface of his mind. If he could be that relentless then for his brother, he could be that way now for his daughter.   
  
"Of course," he answered.  
  
"Good," Carma said, leaning against his chest. "She should be with us. I want our children to know their father."  
  
"We have only one child."  
  
"That's true," Carma said, a ghost of a smile in her eyes. "But in four and a half monens we'll have two."  
  
***  
  
Alainya Crais sat in the garden of her home, reflecting on the events of the last solar day. The memories of the two sons she had born, raised and lost before their time to the Peacekeepers had faded slightly over the cycles, as an old photograph would, but she had never forgotten them. She and her husband had had no more children, neither having the heart to face giving them up too. She had accepted, although her heart longed to cling to hope, that she would never see them again.  
  
And now she had a granddaughter, resting upstairs in her home. Bialar was alive and grown, with a child and a woman, if not a wife, that he apparently loved. She longed to see the evidence of her own eyes, the word of two strangers not having the same weight, but it was more than she had ever hoped for. Both her sons had escaped from the Peacekeepers. True one had escaped through death and the other through disgrace, but it didn't matter. They were free and she could have wished for no better fate for them. That she had one son still alive was blessing enough.  
  
Valen, her husband, had gone with Crichton to the city to search for fuel, leaving Raylani in her care. Although her very traditional husband had initially remained distant, noting with disapproval their lack of bonding tattoos, he had thawed somewhat when their situation had been explained. She knew that he was still not entirely happy that his great-grandchild would be illegitimate, but she also knew - with the wisdom born of long experience - that he would all but forget that the moment the child was born and decide firmly that the father was an appalling libertine who had shamefully taken advantage of his flesh and blood and should be disposed of at the first opportunity. It was perhaps fortunate that Raylani had refused to tell him who the father actually was.  
  
Crichton and Raylani had explained their histories as best they could. Alainya had to admit that they sounded unbelievable, but, having lived in the same village her entire life, she suspected that there were many things she didn't know about. Raylani was very different to how a young woman raised here would be, she was far more guarded and no woman here went about armed. It worried Alainya that her granddaughter would not speak of the father of her child or the circumstances that had brought her here alone. Coming from a world in which couples married young and courting was a steady, sedate affair, she was worried that her husband's assessment of the man in question was correct. Not that Raylani didn't seem perfectly capable of fighting off anyone who attacked her.  
  
Despite the questions she still wanted answered, Alainya was intensely grateful to have a link to her family once again. All she needed to complete her happiness was for her son to come home.  
  
***  
  
"There is one more stop I wish to make," Crais said bluntly, as Carma turned to head back to their pod.  
  
"Where?" Carma asked, her forehead wrinkling. "We have supplies, we know where to go next, there's nothing else we need to do."  
  
"I am not of that opinion," Crais said, placing a hand on the small of her back to guide her in the direction he wished to take.  
  
"Okay, in your *opinion*, what have we forgotten?" Carma asked, following him reluctantly. Her feet hurt and she wanted to get back on Raylani's trail as soon as possible.  
  
"To be bonded," was Crais' matter-of-fact reply, delivered without even glancing at her.  
  
"We didn't forget," Carma pointed out, after a moments' stunned silence, "you've never asked."  
  
"I believe I just did."  
  
"Not the most romantic of proposals."  
  
Crais turned to her then, raising an eyebrow. "I believe we have spent sufficient time together for you to know whether or not you wish to be bonded to me. It would therefore be futile to attempt to change your mind with meaningless gestures."  
  
Carma grinned. "That is logical, Captain."  
  
"Then what is your answer?"  
  
"Well," Carma said, still marching along by his side "since you have obviously made up your mind already, it doesn't look like I have a choice."  
  
Crais stopped so suddenly that Carma took another step before she realised he had halted. She turned back to him. He moved closer to her, until she had to tilt her neck right back to look up at him. His dark eyes looked seriously at her.  
  
"Will you be my wife?"  
  
"Well, like you said," Carma replied, grinning up at him, "I couldn't have known you this long without knowing the answer to that question. And, as it happens, that answer is yes."  
  
***  
  
Raylani watched Crichton set off down the track with a heavy heart. Alainya was right, she should not continue her travels with her child due in only three weekens, but who knew what could happen? If Crichton died, she might never be able to leave this planet, would never see her mother again, would never meet her father.  
  
Crichton and Raylani had agreed that Crais and Carma might well be trying to find her and would, in all likelihood, have picked up their trail. Therefore Crichton intended to back-track along their path slightly and return in time for the birth. If he had not found them by this method, the three of them would continue together.  
  
The three of them. That thought filled her with terror. She knew nothing about how to raise a child, although Alainya was trying very hard to teach her as much as possible in the time she had left. She had chosen a name: Marlin, after her old instructor on the Peacekeeper base. Instinct told her that the child was male. She had no idea what name she would give it if she was wrong. It felt like a hundred cycles since she had left the base. Life there hadn't been perfect, but she'd never been alone.  
  
She heard Alainya calling her inside and turned her back on the now empty road. Hoping that, somehow, all would turn out right.  
  
***  
  
"Captain."  
  
"Scorpius."  
  
Braca was tense. Extremely tense. In the entire time he'd been on this base, Scorpius had never once called him for a private conference. It could only mean one thing, he was ready to attack.  
  
Scorpius had been tempted to draw this out, to make Braca sweat, but desire to see the Captain's face when he made his move was too strong. He motioned for Braca to move closer to his desk. Braca took a pidgin step forward. Scorpius smiled.  
  
"Braca," he said, leaning forward, "I have been reviewing some...surveillance logs. I have discovered something...most interesting."  
  
It didn't take a genius to know what he was talking about.  
  
"Your taste is excellent...if a little unwise," Scorpius said, his lips stretching over his teeth as his chilling smile widened. "I imagine that many people would...object...to your actions. Object...strongly. And I shudder to think what High Command would think of your conduct. A non-Peacekeeper...and the daughter of a wanted renegade who is responsible for the destruction of a Peacekeeper command carrier and my wormhole project. Whose mother is a genetic mutant who grew up away from all Peacekeeper influence. Her presence here was tolerated...but your rather more *intimate* relations might be judged as having...influenced you. And, as you know, Peacekeeper High Command...has very strict guidelines about irreversible contamination."  
  
Braca's mind went into overdrive, trying to find a solution. Scorpius began again before he could speak.  
  
"Of course, a recreational tryst...would probably not be remarked on. However," Scorpius said, standing up from his desk and moving round to stand behind Braca, continuing his speech directly into Braca's right ear, "an association that lasts so long and involves such an obvious emotional attachment...is a different matter."  
  
A cold shiver went down Braca's spine, although whether that was from the threat or just close proximity to Scorpius he couldn't tell. After serving as his lieutenant for several cycles, it was a feeling Braca was fairly familiar with.  
  
"If I pass this information to High Command," Scorpius continued, "...you will face the living death. Alternatively...you could take your own life. However...I have a third solution for you."  
  
Braca looked up in surprise. His fear did not decrease.  
  
"Crais...was correct about one thing, Braca," Scorpius said, his smile now oily. "You are a *consummate* Peacekeeper. But you also wish to survive. So...I will allow you to."  
  
Then he let the axe fall.  
  
"You will leave the Peacekeepers, become a renegade like Crais, perhaps even meet up with the lovely Raylani again. You will spend the rest of your days...trying to stay alive. And we shall see...if you can." 


	6. It's all coming together

Chapter 6: It's all coming together.  
  
The air was heavy with perfume and Carma was finding it hard to breathe. She opened her eyes, glancing at Crais kneeling opposite her. Like her he was dressed in ceremonial garments. His broad chest was partly visible in the toga he was wearing, which would have distracted her if she weren't so focused on staying calm in the oppressive atmosphere. His robes were black, hers white - symbols of opposites joining she assumed. It seemed her people had done away with some of the fancier aspects of the Sebacean bonding ceremony.  
  
Crais opened his eyes and caught her looking at him. He took her hands in his as they began to synchronise their breathing. The mist surrounding them was now starting to make them both light-headed, a sensation both found difficult to accept. It took great self-control not to break away, but that was the purpose. Surrendering to each other and the universe was what they were here to do.  
  
"Carma?"  
  
"Bialar...this is incredible."  
  
The words, spoken with thought and not vocalised, were the beginning. As they both began to relax and let the chemicals in the air supply enter their systems, the link between them intensified. Carma found herself seeing things in Crais' past that until now she'd seen only through Talyn's eyes. She saw herself through Crais' eyes and knew that he was seeing himself through hers.  
  
No words, no uncertainty, no questions. They both knew exactly how the other felt. When they'd arrived here, they'd been told that this part of the ceremony would remove all doubt about the decision they were making. Some couples left afterwards, often one was heart broken over their discoveries, but the ones that continued knew beyond all doubt that their decision was the right one. Feeling someone else's love for you as if it were your own for them left no secrets. That was why it was practised.  
  
Carma felt Crais' hands cup her chin and a moment later his lips on hers. She returned the kiss hungrily and, still able to feel everything the other did, they lost all sense of time as they made love.  
  
***  
  
Carma rubbed the back of her hand ruefully, the newly-tattooed flesh tender and red. She understood the concept of a permanent mark to signify their permanent bond, but that didn't make it hurt any less. She studied the design that had been burned into her flesh, the intricate circular pattern intriguing her. It was unlike anything she had seen on her world and was curious about its significance.  
  
"It is the eternal circle," Crais said, almost seeming to pick up her thoughts as he traced the design on his own hand. "There are many different parts, but all join together. A symbol of a bond without end. Do you not have something similar on your planet?"  
  
Carma didn't answer right away, instead she pulled off her jacket. They were sitting in the public gardens next to the boarding house they had stayed at the previous night. She swept her hair, which had grown much too long for space travel, Crais noted, off her neck and showed him the tattoo that he suddenly realised he had noticed almost two cycles earlier and forgotten about.  
  
"This symbol," she said, "is the Teraxian symbol of faith. I was given this tattoo at birth, a symbol that my parents had absolute faith that I would grow to be wise and strong." She turned back to Crais. "When a couple marry, they will usually exchange gifts that bear this symbol to seal their promise of faith in each other and their union. I suppose no one will have heard of that here."  
  
"It is not normally practiced, as far as I am aware," Crais admitted, "but I am certain that there is a craftsperson here who could create such tokens."  
  
Carma sighed happily and lay back on the grassy bank. There was only one thing missing now...their daughter.  
  
***  
  
Braca loathed being a renegade. He'd spent his entire career following orders, serving without question so that he could rise up the ranks. Now his life had lost all sense of structure, he was in a world where he didn't know the rules.   
  
He needed a goal. Braca always had a goal in mind, that was how he operated. Every time he'd said 'yes' against his will - first to Crais, then Scorpius, then Grayza - it had been because he was focused on his ultimate goal and little details didn't matter. And now that goal had been taken away from him.  
  
So he focused on the one thing he wanted and might have a chance of getting - Raylani. Scorpius hadn't been wrong about the emotional connection, it had been the one really stupid thing he'd done in his life. It had started well, they'd recreated and he'd had at least a taste of revenge on Crais. If he'd stopped then he wouldn't be here now. But he hadn't, he'd kept seeing her. He hadn't even realised that it was becoming more until the night she'd told him she were leaving. What had happened that night hadn't been recreation. He wasn't exactly sure what it had been, but it hadn't been recreation. And he'd thrown his life away for it.  
  
So he'd find her. Maybe recreate with her some more, maybe kill her, maybe just....anything. He'd get her out of his system. It wasn't like he had anything else to do.  
  
***  
  
Raylani was having an out-of-body experience. Crais' entire family had descended and the female half had surrounded her and smothered her in a blanket of baby clothes. She'd had no idea that her father had so many relatives. There seemed to be a family of Craises in every village (two being rather a lot to deal with) and every second one had travelled here. The inn-keeper, owning the only rooms for rent in the village, was now her devoted servant.  
  
She'd been introduced to a never-ending flood of strangers, who all raised an eyebrow at her lack of bonding tattoo and were given a stern look by Alainya, but greeted her warmly. And they had all brought gifts. She had begun to wonder how many babies they thought she was having. She must have enough clothes for a dozen at least!  
  
Crichton was still away, looking for her parents, and the baby was due in less than a weeken. She was increasingly frightened of being stuck here alone. Not that she could be alone with Crais' family all around her, but she wanted her mother. She wasn't sure she could bear the guilt if her actions meant that Carma never knew her grandchild.  
  
Later that evening, she was sitting with Alainya at the front of the house, finally safe from the swarm of well-meaning relatives. She stared at the setting sun, her hands on her stomach, thinking of...everyone.  
  
"Are you going to tell me?"  
  
"Tell you what?" Raylani asked, pulling herself out of her reverie.  
  
"About the father," Alainya said gently.   
  
Raylani stiffened. "I don't think that's a good idea."  
  
Alainya nodded slowly. "Will you at least answer one question?"  
  
"What is it?" Raylani asked, keeping her gaze fixed on the colourful sky.  
  
"Did he..." Alainya paused, not certain how to ask her, "did he...hurt you?"  
  
Raylani started. "No," she said, suddenly realising what had been bothering her grandmother all this time. "No. He...was someone I...chose."  
  
"Did you love him?"  
  
"I tried not to."  
  
"Why?" Alainya asked, amazed. "Why would you not want to love someone?"  
  
"Because he would never love me. And because...the reason why I won't tell you or Crichton who he is, is that my father knows him and...hates him. He'd never understand how I could have...how he could be the father."  
  
"And your mother?"  
  
"She knows him, but not well. I think she would accept it, but my father wouldn't, I'm sure."  
  
Alainya sighed. "I hope you have the chance to be proved wrong."  
  
***  
  
Crichton knew he should have turned back by now. He'd been about to, hating to give up, but then he'd found what he was sure was Talyn's signal. His small craft seemed to crawl along as they moved closer to the source. He was afraid that Talyn would starburst before he was within communications range.  
  
He was still reeling from the shock of meeting Crais' parents. He was even more shocked that he liked them. Crais' father was so straight-laced, he reminded Crichton incredibly of his Great Aunt Marion. So much so that he'd had to force the image of Valen Crais peering at him through old fashioned spectacles out of his mind to keep from laughing. And Crais' mother...well, she explained a lot.  
  
Long hair, still black in places although mostly grey now. Greyish eyes, high cheekbones, chiselled features. She looked more like Aeryn than Xhalax had. 'I wonder if Crais ever noticed it,' Crichton mused. One thing was certain, if Crais hadn't noticed, Crichton would be pointing it out. Freud would've loved it.  
  
A sharp beep from his control panel told him that he was finally within communications range, although he still couldn't scan to be sure that it really was Talyn. He'd take the risk.  
  
"Crais," he said. "Crais, this is Crichton. I know I'm supposed to be dead, I'll fill you in later. I've got something important to tell you."  
  
He waited for an answer and got nothing. Groaning in frustration, he realised he'd just have to wait until he got nearer.  
  
***  
  
"Do you expect me to believe that?"  
  
Braca swallowed. Aeryn Sun was playing her role as interrogator just a little too well. And for once he was telling the absolute truth. Moya had come out of starburst almost on top of him and scooped him up in the docking web before he could get away. The last thing he'd wanted was to have Crichton let loose on him. Instead Crichton wasn't there and Aeryn was doing his part. And here he was, chained up in one of their cells. No one served as second in command to Scorpius without becoming accustomed to seeing their life flash before their eyes, but this was the first time he'd seen it because of anyone else.  
  
"It's the truth," he croaked.  
  
"I suppose now you want to join us?"  
  
That thought hadn't even crossed his mind. But Crais had, hadn't he? And he hadn't hurt them half as much as Crais had.  
  
"Would you allow me to?" he asked, more out of curiosity than anything else.  
  
Aeryn raised an eyebrow at him, but gave no answer. Braca swallowed again, wondering what his fate would be.  
  
***  
  
Crais and Carma returned to Talyn the next morning, looking much like newly-weds anywhere. Which is to say, absolutely exhausted but suspiciously happy. They were both hoping for a nice, uneventful day on Talyn that would allow them to spend time alone together. It wasn't to be.  
  
Talyn gave no indication that anything was wrong as they approached, and Crais was too pre-occupied to pay attention to all the information from the sensors. He landed the transport pod with ease and he and Carma climbed out, Crais turning to kiss her near the bottom.  
  
"Welcome home," an oh-so-familiar voice said. Crais nearly lost his footing on the ramp. He and Carma stared at the figure awaiting them. Then they walked unsteadily down the last few steps and approached him.  
  
"Crichton," Crais said, his expression and tone displaying total shock. "You're alive. How?"  
  
"Long story," Crichton said casually. "I'll fill you in on the way."  
  
"The way where?" Carma asked, equally stunned.  
  
"The way home," Crichton said, smiling slightly. "Your home, Crais, we found it."  
  
"My home?" Crais asked. His voice rose an octave on the word 'home' but, this being Crais, his voice still sounded deep.  
  
Crichton grinned. "Yeah Crais, your home. We'd better get going, they're expecting us."  
  
"Crichton," Crais began, "I am not certain if...."  
  
Crichton waved his objections aside. "Sorry Crais, it's out of your hands, I already talked Talyn into it. Besides, even if you're not sure about seeing your parents, I'm betting you want to meet your daughter."  
  
"Raylani is there?" Carma asked, her face breaking into a smile.  
  
"Yup," Crichton said, "she's there. That's why we have to get back quickly." He grinned wickedly, unable to resist. "I'm sure you don't want to miss the birth of your grandchild."  
  
That was one shock too many, Crais' vision began to cloud over.  
  
"Our what?" Carma asked, certain she had heard wrong.  
  
"Your grandchild," Crichton repeated calmly.  
  
Some primordial instinct took over Crais' overloaded brain. He grabbed his pulse pistol and pointed it at Crichton. "If you have harmed her...I will kill you," he said, his knees shaking.  
  
Crichton held up his hands. "Whoa, Crais, it wasn't me! Not that she isn't kinda hot...but she's a bit young. And she's your daughter...which is just too weird."  
  
Crais turned to Carma. "Why did you not tell me there was a man?"  
  
"I didn't know," Carma said, as stunned as him. "She never said anything. I had a feeling once that there might be someone, but she denied it and I never had the slightest idea who it might be."  
  
"Do you know?" Crais asked Crichton abruptly.  
  
"No," Crichton said. "She wouldn't tell me either. You'll have to ask her. But right now we have to get going. It's due in less than a weeken and it'll take at least that long to get back." He slapped his comm badge. "Talyn, take us out."  
  
Crais was too shell-shocked even to care that Crichton was giving orders.  
  
***  
  
It was four arns before Raylani told anyone she was in labour. It wasn't so bad to start off with and she ignored it, trying to convince herself that it hadn't started yet. She was suddenly terrified of giving birth, and miserable that Crichton still wasn't back. Struggling to lift her heavy frame out of bed, she moved slowly across the landing to Alainya and Valen's bedroom and knocked. One look when she opened the door told Alainya everything she needed to know.   
  
"Come on," she said, leading Raylani back to her bed. "It won't be long now." 


	7. My family and other animals

Chapter 7: My family and other animals.  
  
On an otherwise event-less morning, the residents of the small village of Marcase were convulsed by the appearance of three harassed-looking Sebaceans in black leather. The two men were marching along, their stride as long as possible without causing serious injury to themselves. The woman, just showing signs of a pregnancy, was trying to follow suit. However, being rather shorter than the others, she was having to walk twice as fast to keep up. Before they left the village she grabbed the arms of both men and forced them to slow down. The two men slowed, but within ten microts had returned to their former pace, much to the woman's annoyance. Their conversation was loud enough to be heard by everyone in the village.  
  
"I do not see how you could be unaware that your daughter was recreating with a Peacekeeper officer!"  
  
"I was trying to do my job so I could stay alive! Anyway, it's not my fault that she takes after you!"  
  
"And *what*, exactly, is that supposed to mean?"  
  
"Oh come on Bialar, I bet you recreated with half the Peacekeeper fleet."  
  
"I most certainly did not!"  
  
"Crais, she's paying you a compliment."  
  
"No, I'm not. I'm accusing him of having more libido than common sense, something which it seems Raylani has inherited."  
  
"Ah, not a compliment."  
  
"I have always exercised common sense in my choices."  
  
"Yeah, that's why you picked Aeryn."  
  
"WHAT?!"  
  
"Later, Crichton."  
  
***  
  
"Mum," Raylani whispered, worn out after more than twenty arns in pain.  
  
"Hi honey," Carma said softly, sitting down beside her. "How's it going?"  
  
"Mum, I have to explain...."  
  
"Later," Carma said, shaking her head, "we can talk about it later."  
  
Raylani dropped her eyes and noticed Carma's stomach. "Mum, you're...."  
  
Carma put a hand to her stomach, self-consciously. "Yeah, I am. But we'll talk about that later as well. Right now, we have a new life to bring into the world."  
  
***  
  
Crais and Crichton were sitting, side-by-side, waiting. The whole situation seemed rather surreal to Crais. He'd been a father for two cycles and, in a few short arns, he'd be a grandfather. That was bizarre. But just now he was in a kind of limbo, waiting for the damn to burst, waiting for Crichton to kill him. He didn't have long to wait.  
  
"You recreated with Aeryn?"  
  
"Yes." There was no point in denying it.  
  
"When?"  
  
"A few monens ago, when we believed that both you and Carma were dead."  
  
"Why?"  
  
Crais sighed. "Intoxicants, misery and convenience."  
  
"More than once?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"Good?"  
  
"I do not remember."  
  
Crichton nodded, strangely calm. They sat there for another few microts in silence.   
  
Then Crichton launched himself at Crais. The two men crashed to the floor, Crichton's hands wrapped firmly around Crais' neck. Straddling Crais, Crichton began to rhythmically thump Crais' head against the floor, as Crais struggled to get free...not to mention breathe. Taking advantage of his superior training, Crais managed to prevent death coming immediately, but Crichton was not to be put off.  
  
"You know," Carma said, watching them in amusement from the doorway, "where I come from, you two would have to get married now."  
  
Crichton turned in the direction of her voice and Crais took the opportunity to escape his grasp. They both looked up at her.  
  
It was then they realised that she held a small bundle in her arms.   
  
"Can you behave long enough to say hello?" Carma asked, grinning.  
  
Crais and Crichton scrambled to their feet, both feeling like they were about twelve again. Crais shot a nervous glance at Crichton, he wasn't exactly sure whether or not Crichton had finished with him.  
  
Carma approached them and gently placed the bundle into Crais' arms. "Isn't he beautiful?" she said, her eyes glowing with happiness and pride at their grandson. Crais looked down at the tiny creature he was holding. His grandson looked back up at him through clear blue eyes and Crais was forced to admit that this was one of the most lovely things he had ever seen. Although thoroughly un-Crais-like.  
  
"How is Raylani?" he asked, realising that he had still not met his daughter, even though he held her son in his arms.  
  
"She's fine," Carma said. "Tired, but fine. I thought we should leave the big introductions until tomorrow, but Raylani wants to see both of you now. If you can behave yourself, that is," she said, giving both of them dirty looks.  
  
"We'll be good," Crichton promised, somewhat sheepishly.  
  
The three of them entered Raylani's bedroom. Alainya looked up as they came in. Crais noticed her and found a lump in his throat. "Mother," he croaked.  
  
Crichton shifted uncomfortably. "You know, I think I'll leave you lot alone to get on with the family reunion." He kissed Raylani on the forehead. "He's gorgeous," he said. She smiled at him. Crichton gave a quick smile back and left.  
  
Five Craises regarded each other. Crais himself didn't know what to do first - reunite with his mother, meet his daughter or introduce his wife.  
  
"What do you think of him?" Raylani asked, breaking the silence.  
  
Crais looked down again at the child in his arms, then handed him back to Raylani. He cleared his throat. "An excellent addition to our family," he said, sounding calmer than he felt.  
  
Alainya cleared her own throat. "It...looks like there will be another," she said, glancing at Carma.   
  
"Yes," Crais replied, unable to believe that it was his mother here with him. "My wife and I are expecting another child."  
  
"Your wife?" Alainya asked, hopefully.  
  
"His wife," Carma confirmed. "It's only been a weeken," she said, a little shyly, "but better late than never."  
  
Alainya rose and moved round the bed so she could embrace her new daughter-in-law. When she released her, she stood in front of her son. There were tears glistening in her eyes as she realised that it had been almost ninety cycles since she had last held him in her arms. And then he'd been a child, now he was a grown man. She wrapped her arms tight around him and leant her head against his chest as she held him, realising with amazement that the scrawny little boy was now as tall and broad as his father. She turned her head to look up at him, her eyes tracing the outlines of his face, taking in the dark eyes and the beard. She felt like breaking down in tears. Half from happiness that he was home again, half from sadness at all the cycles she had missed.  
  
All eyes turned to Raylani then and they realised that she had fallen asleep with baby Marlin in her arms. Alainya gently picked up her great-grandson and placed him in the small basket ready by the bed.  
  
"I think we should let her get some rest," she whispered.  
  
They tiptoed out of the door. As soon as it was closed behind them, Crais turned to Alainya. "Where is my father?" he asked.  
  
***  
  
Valen Crais was exactly where Alainya had said he would be. Climbing the small hill that bordered his father's farm was more of a strain than he remembered it being when he was young and he wondered if he'd allowed himself to get out of condition. He'd begin to rectify that as soon as they returned to Talyn. He found his father standing at the top, arms folded behind his back, back ram-rod straight, looking down on his lands.  
  
"You're home."  
  
"Yes," Crais answered, coming to stand beside his father.  
  
"I take it that my great-grandchild has arrived."  
  
"He has."  
  
"Is your...partner...with you?"  
  
"My wife."  
  
His father inclined his head slightly, raising an eyebrow. "I am pleased to know that you have finally seen sense."  
  
Crais sighed. "Father, in the world I inhabit bonding ceremonies cannot take top priority."  
  
"They should when there is a child involved."  
  
Crais couldn't help smiling to himself. Some things never changed. Valen Crais was the same man he remembered, except now he didn't seem quite so tall. It was a shock seeing him from the perspective of a grown man, when all these cycles his memories had been those of a child.  
  
"Do you intend to meet your great-grandson?" Crais asked, looking out at the view below him.  
  
He was surprised when his father reached out and took his hand.   
  
"Take me to him," he said quietly. Then, gruffly. "I am glad that you are home...my son."  
  
***  
  
Much later that night, leaving Carma asleep in their bed, Crais slipped quietly into Raylani's room. She was asleep, which gave him a chance to study her properly for the first time. She looked almost exactly like Carma, except for her dark eyes and wavy hair - things she'd inherited from him. He tried hard to make himself understand that she was his daughter. He remembered only the tiny baby girl he'd held so briefly in his arms and found it impossible to connect the two. And now he was a grandfather.  
  
His grandson began to wake up. A little awkwardly, Crais bent down and picked him up, trying to comfort him. It quickly became obvious that he needed more than a cuddle. Raylani stirred and woke up as her son began to whimper and wail. Sleepily, surprised at Crais being there, she took Marlin from him and brought him to her breast. Crais felt ridiculously embarrassed and wondered if he should leave. He started to get up, but Raylani shook her head.  
  
"I want to talk to you," she said. "Although...I don't really know what to say."  
  
"Nor do I," Crais answered, sitting down again and focusing his eyes on her face. "I am finding it...difficult...to think of you as my daughter."  
  
Raylani smiled sadly. "I guess we missed the bonding stage."  
  
Crais cleared his throat. "I am...very proud of you. Because of you I have a...very fine grandson." He paused a moment. "Why will you not tell us who the father is?"  
  
Raylani sighed. "It's really better for everyone that I don't. He'll never be a part of Marlin's life, so it's not necessary to know."  
  
"Am I acquainted with him then?"  
  
"Yes...I believe you have met, that's why I think it's better that you don't know. It would be...unsettling."  
  
Crais looked down at his grandson. He did look strangely familiar, but he couldn't think who he resembled.  
  
"Very well," he said, still curious. "If that is your decision."  
  
They regarded each other in silence for a few microts. Raylani cleared her throat. "Can I...can we come back to Talyn with you?"  
  
"Of course," Crais answered, pushing aside the practical considerations that wanted to crowd his mind. "You are both...my family."  
  
***  
  
The general impression Braca had was that it could have been a lot worse. Aeryn had made him sweat for a while before she gave her punishment but, reluctantly deciding that nothing that had happened to Moya's crew had actually been his fault, she had decided not to do him any serious damage. Instead the crew had actually begun to enjoy having him there, because they were making him do everything that they didn't want to do.  
  
Which, at this precise moment, was the laundry. Braca's captain's coat was in a corner keeping dry and he was clad in his sleeveless black T-shirt, up to his elbows in Moya's amnexus fluid. If Crichton had been there, he would have been killing himself laughing.   
  
But Moya meant Talyn, which meant Crais, which (probably) meant Raylani. It was only a matter of time. 


	8. Romeo and Juliet: Between Marriage and D...

Chapter 8: Romeo and Juliet - Between Marriage and Death  
  
Commander John Crichton sat with Marlin Crais in his lap, singing a modified, out-of-tune version of 'rock-a-bye-baby'. Marlin dozed quietly, good-naturedly putting up with it. With Crichton missing a woman and Marlin missing a father, they had cheerfully managed to fill the void in each other's lives. Raylani, after all her fears, had taken to motherhood with astonishing ease and Crichton had jumped at the chance to play daddy.  
  
Crais found the relationship intensely disturbing. He did *not* want Crichton to get this involved with his family - his daughter or his grandson. In fact, he was beginning to wonder if Crichton was looking to be more than friends with Raylani. True he was supposed to love Aeryn, but Aeryn wasn't there. And, from what he had heard, Crichton's eye had a tendency to wander whenever she was elsewhere.  
  
Any romantic thoughts that Crichton did have were not sticking. Every time he found himself thinking about her that way he looked at her eyes. They reminded him of Crais. It was the most effective form of contraception he'd ever found.  
  
Marlin finally drifted off to sleep. Crichton placed him gently in his Moses basket, picked it up and left his quarters. Heading for the galley...and Raylani.  
  
***  
  
Ex-Captain Llyn Braca felt like a traitor. He was remembering the day that Crais had returned to his old command carrier, the one he had later destroyed. He'd called Crais a traitor and meant it. Crais had acted like he had forgotten all his breeding, all that he had been taught and chosen to follow his own selfish and misguided ends. At least, that had been his judgement. When Scorpius had forced him to leave the Peacekeepers, he'd almost panicked at leaving everything he'd believed in for so long. He felt like a traitor now because the strangest thought had popped into his head - that he was better off.  
  
A weeken ago he'd fallen seriously ill, the result of something he'd picked up on the first visit to a commerce planet he'd been allowed to accompany the others on. And it had been Jool, the Interion - a member of an inferior species - who had healed him and cared for him like they were friends. She wasn't bound by duty and she'd asked for nothing in return.  
  
It was a new world.  
  
***  
  
That morning, for the first time since she'd returned, Carma had placed her transponder in its socket. She'd settled herself down, alone in command, allowing Talyn to swap bodies with her for a short time - to satisfy his curiosity about the child growing within her. She was four monens pregnant now and impatient for it to be over. Talyn found it fascinating though and was overjoyed at the chance to experience it.   
  
When Talyn had returned to his own body and she'd removed the transponder, Carma leant her head against the bulkhead and closed her eyes, thinking over the events of the last few monens. There were so many things bothering her. Crais wasn't the only one concerned about Raylani's relationship with Crichton, Carma didn't want her daughter involved with him either. Not because she had the same lingering mistrust as Crais, but because she knew that Aeryn was still Crichton's first choice. Raylani would be no more than a passing distraction and her daughter didn't need to deal with that. Marlin bothered her too. He was a lovely child, but she too found his face familiar. She had one advantage over Crais, she'd been on the base with Raylani. She hadn't met too many people there either. If she recognised that face it couldn't belong to too many people. She'd thought over it until, halfway through a sleep cycle, it had suddenly hit her who he reminded her of. She'd woken up instantly, as if from a nightmare, knowing exactly who Marlin's father was and feeling distinctly nauseous. Her suddenly movement had woken Crais and it had been all she could do to convince him that she'd only had a bad dream. But it wasn't a dream, it was real.  
  
What made it terrible was that, reading between the lines, she had begun to suspect that Raylani loved, or at least cared for, the father of her child. She should have paid more attention to her when they'd been on the base. She couldn't believe that she'd been so negligent, leaving her child to fall for the most unsuitable of men. 'But then,' she thought wryly, "would it have made any difference if I had been there?'.  
  
Perhaps it was just as well that she would probably never see him again. Raylani might never forget him, but she would recover in time. Yes, indeed, it was just as well.  
  
Talyn signalled excitedly, bringing her out of her reverie. Moya had just entered sensor range.  
  
***  
  
Crais was suddenly finding it very hard not to laugh. Standing in Talyn's docking bay, regarding Braca - whom Aeryn had brought over - was just too perfect. The consummate Peacekeeper had been forced over to the other side of the tracks. Who was the traitor now?  
  
But before he could enjoy it properly, there was one thing he had to take care of. "Aeryn," he said calmly, "there is someone here whom I believe you will wish to see."  
  
That was his cue. Crichton opened the bay doors and walked in. Aeryn's mouth dropped open and she looked for a moment as if she were going to faint. "Hello Aeryn," Crichton said simply.  
  
Crais took a step towards Braca. "Come," he said and strode out of the bay. Braca trailed behind him, wondering what Crais would do to him.  
  
***  
  
Braca had been on Talyn for an entire solar day and he still hadn't seen Raylani. The crew of Moya had given up waiting for Aeryn to return and had left them both on Talyn while they went to get supplies from a commerce planet two days' journey away. It was halfway through the sleep cycle and he was still awake. Since Talyn would accept orders only from Crais or Carma, it hadn't seemed necessary to lock him into his quarters during the night. He wandered to the galley for a midnight snack, thinking to himself how un-Peacekeeper-like some of his habits had become. When he was a Peacekeeper he hadn't allowed himself to question even the slightest part of the rules and he couldn't believe how quickly he'd shaken off the things he hadn't even realised he didn't like.  
  
He'd just bitten into a food cube when the door opened. He froze mid-bite, Raylani froze in the doorway, Marlin snuggled happily against her, immune to the tension permeating the atmosphere.  
  
Later, Braca wondered if his heart had actually stopped beating at that moment. He was convinced that he'd suffered some kind of brain damage. Why else would he have forgotten how to speak? He'd been thinking about seeing her again. He'd imagined quite a few different scenarios. But, to be honest, none of them had involved her wearing a fluffy dressing gown and carrying a small baby. Actually his fantasies had mainly involved a small negligee and a large bed, but that was another story....  
  
They remained where they were, staring at each other, until Marlin realised that his mother was tense and unresponsive and let out an experimental wail. Raylani snapped back to reality and kissed him on the forehead, cuddling him as she took a tentative step towards the galley table.  
  
"Hello," she said. "Can't sleep?"  
  
If it had been just her, Braca might have managed to conduct a casual conversation, but his attention was locked on the child in her arms. His chest had constricted and he'd lost all feeling from the waist downwards.  
  
"You can hold him if you want," Raylani said calmly, helping herself to one of Braca's forgotten food cubes and popping it in her mouth. "After all, he is your son."  
  
That just about finished him off. His head started to spin and he nearly blacked out. This was a dream, it had to be.  
  
"It's not a dream," Raylani said, as if she could read his mind. "He's your son. He's three monens old and his name is Marlin. You can touch him, he won't break."  
  
Braca found the child placed into his arms before he could even begin to gather his thoughts. He held him like he was a bomb, set to go off at any second, and looked down at his son.  
  
Marlin looked up curiously at the new stranger. Deciding that he looked perfectly nice, he reached up and tried to grab Braca's nose. It didn't work that well, only grandpa really had one big enough to get firm hold of. Braca saw the tiny creature, with a face so much like his, and nearly lost consciousness. No amount of Peacekeeper training had prepared him for this moment.  
  
Raylani hastily took her son back from him, seeing Braca's stare begin to go glassy and waited for a verbal reaction. It didn't come.  
  
"Marlin needs to be put back to bed," she said, tired of waiting. "If you come with me, we can talk...I can talk...some more."  
  
In a daze, not entirely sure that his legs would support him all that way, Braca followed her.  
  
***  
  
By the time they reached Raylani's quarters, the first cloud of shock had blown over and Braca began to attempt rational conversation.  
  
"How?" he blurted out, one syllable all he could cope with at that moment.  
  
Raylani paused a moment in tucking Marlin into his cot. "Thanks a lot. It's so flattering to know that you don't even remember what we did."  
  
Turning, she saw Braca's still-stunned expression and sighed. "We recreated. I got pregnant. He was born. What else can I tell you?"  
  
She settled herself down by Marlin's cot and began to sing softly to him, coaxing him to go back to sleep. Braca slowly made his way over to her bed and sat down on it, trying to get his head round the idea that he was a father. He'd probably fathered more offspring, but this was the only one he knew about, the only one he'd held in his arms. It made, he realised, a lot of difference.  
  
With Marlin asleep, Raylani moved back towards Braca, sitting down on the bed beside him.  
  
"My parents will kill you if they find out that he is your child. If you stay here, I think it is inevitable. So I think you should go to Moya when she returns."  
  
Braca nodded, enough wits remaining to understand the sense of what she was saying.  
  
"I'd suggest getting far away. Even on Moya someone may eventually figure it out, especially as he grows older. It would be easier if he didn't look so much like you," Raylani continued. "For as long as you're here, you can come and see him during the sleep cycle if you want to - like tonight. Otherwise, there's nothing to work out."  
  
She turned back to Braca to get his reaction. His reaction was to place one hand on the back of her head and pull her lips to his, kissing her fiercely.  
  
When he released her, her head was spinning as much as his. "This complicates things a little," she whispered.  
  
"Things are already complicated," Braca replied, feeling closer to being reckless than he ever had in his life before. He pulled her back to him, giving her no chance to bring logic to the situation.  
  
Raylani didn't try, she just kissed him back. 'One night can't hurt," she thought as she pulled off his jacket.  
  
***  
  
Crais moved down the corridor at the closest thing to a leisurely pace that he was capable of. He and Raylani had made it a point over the last few monens to eat breakfast together some mornings and talk. He was still a long way from knowing his daughter as he should, but they had made a start. And he enjoyed the chance to get to know his tiny grandson.  
  
Reaching Raylani's quarters, he activated the door chime. Carma had asked him to install them several monens earlier, insisting that there should be more privacy on Talyn. He received no answer. That surprised him because Raylani was usually up long before anyone else and Marlin must be due to be fed. Deciding that she must have overslept, he hit the door controls anyway and strode in.  
  
Picture the scene: Raylani and Braca curled comfortably together - her back to his front - fast asleep amid sheets about five microts away from falling off the bed. Braca has his arm around Raylani's waist and they both have smiles on their faces. Both are obviously naked.  
  
It was Crais' worst nightmare.  
  
Horror became white-hot anger in 0.3 microts. Uttering what could only be described as a feral growl, Crais covered the distance to the bed in three strides, looking like a starving tiger who had just been released from his cage.  
  
Braca's sub-conscious heard the footsteps - and the growl - and woke him up. He opened his eyes just in time to see Crais' thundercloud face a microt before Crais wrapped one large hand around his neck.  
  
Hell might have no fury like a woman scorned, but man (of any species) possesses limitless strength when consumed by the same fury. Crais picked Braca up by his neck and began to shake him - stark naked - like a ragdoll. Braca desperately tried to pull Crais' hands from around his neck and restore his air supply.  
  
Raylani was rudely awakened by Crais' outraged descriptions of the death that Braca was to face. Horrified, partly that he was there and partly by what he was doing to Braca, she grabbed his hand as well and managed to pry his fingers away from Braca's neck. Braca collapsed on the bed, coughing violently as Crais turned his flaming eyes to Raylani. For the first time actually scared of her father, Raylani shrank back...just as Crichton ran into the room.  
  
"What the hell is...." Crichton started, stopping short when he saw the spectacle. His mouth dropped open in shock.   
  
You could pinpoint the exact moment when the penny dropped for both men. Their movements synchronised, they turned first to Marlin and then back to Raylani and Braca - who both looked white with fear.  
  
Crais reached for his pulse pistol. Crichton realised what he was going to do a microt before he did it and roughly grabbed both Crais' arms, pinning them behind his back. Crais struggled violently, his eyes glowing pools of lava. "Let me go, Crichton!" he shouted.   
  
"I'm not going to do that," Crichton told him, a strength born of necessity allowing him to keep the enraged Crais under control. "You don't know what you're doing."   
  
"I know exactly what I'm doing!" Crais hissed. "I am going to snap his miserable, puny neck for what he has done!"  
  
"You're not, Crais, I'm not going to let you."  
  
"You intend to just let him get away with this?!"  
  
"I think that Raylani is the only one allowed to punish him...or not," Crichton said. Both men turned to look at the couple on the bed.  
  
Braca's heart was racing in his chest. Raylani looked stricken. "Father, I...." she began.  
  
Crais looked from Raylani to Braca and back again. "I do not believe that there is anything you can say," he said. Wrenching himself free from Crichton, he stalked out of the room. Crichton glanced back at them and followed him. He paused a microt at the door and turned to them.  
  
"Now I know love is blind," he said flatly and left.  
  
Marlin, woken by all the noise, began to cry. His parents both knew exactly how he felt. 


	9. The doctor will see you now

Chapter 9: The doctor will see you now....  
  
Bialar Crais stood in Talyn's command, staring in the direction of the viewscreen, his jaw set. Carma Crais came through the doors and took a deep breath. This was not going to be easy.  
  
Moving in front of her husband and sliding her arms around his waist as far as she could with her swollen belly getting in the way, she looked up at him. "Feeling any calmer yet?" she asked softly.  
  
Crais looked down at her then and Carma almost cried out. There was more emotion in his eyes at that moment than she'd seen in all the time she'd known him. And the main one was hurt, which he was channelling into anger. "Bialar..." she said, almost lost for words, "I didn't know you would care so much about this."  
  
"You do not seem as...surprised as I am."  
  
It was a statement, almost an accusation. Carma sighed. "I knew before this," she said. Crais' eyes began to darken in anger. "She never told me," Carma explained quickly. "But I found that Marlin looked so familiar...and I realised a monen ago who he reminded me of."  
  
Crais' shoulders sagged. "Then why did I not see it?" he said, in an exhausted voice.  
  
Carma looked up at him, sympathy in her eyes. "Maybe because you didn't want to. I thought about telling you...but Raylani made it so clear that she didn't want us to know, I knew what your reaction would be and I *never* expected him to enter our lives like this."  
  
Crais was silent for a few microts. "Of all the men she could have chosen...how could it be him?" he forced out, the lines of tension around his mouth deepening.  
  
Carma gave a half-smile. "Love is never logical," she said. "Look at us. With all I have put you through, the only rational course of action would have been to leave me. But you never did."  
  
Crais shook his head. "I...cannot accept him as a member of my family."  
  
"I'd imagine that Braca feels the same way. But Bialar...what if you have to take him to have Raylani?" She brought one of his hands to her stomach. "Or do you intend to reject her and make do with just this child?"   
  
Crais didn't answer.   
  
"Sleep on it," Carma said. "Things will become clearer."  
  
"The sleep cycle ended only four arns ago. I am not tired."  
  
Carma grinned. "Now that," she said, sliding her hands up his chest to pull his head down to hers, "I can do something about...."  
  
***  
  
The studio audience burst into tumultuous applause as their host, a Mr Jury Spinger, took centre stage. The sign over him flashed from 'Clap' to 'Don't Clap' and the audience obediently hushed as Jury prepared to open the second half.  
  
"Ladies and gentlemen, we are having a very interesting show today. Our subject is 'I hate my daughter's boyfriend'. Now before the break we talked to Gary, whose daughter Jessica's boyfriend Richie tried to dismember him with a chain saw and Elizabeth who is afraid that her intended son-in-law David may be possessed by aliens. But our next story has a slightly different angle to it, because the couple in question...are parents."  
  
The audience tittered, several disapproving sounds were heard.  
  
"Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome...." Jury looked down at the card he held and beckoned to his assistant, who darted to his side like a mouse. "Is this right?" he muttered, indicating the name on the card. The assistant nodded mutely. Jury waved her off, frowning at his cue card. "Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome the slightly unusually named...Bialar."  
  
Crais walked onto the set, feeling thoroughly self-conscious, surprised at the volume of applause that he was receiving. He stepped onto the stage and sat down awkwardly in one of the chairs provided, his back still ram-rod straight.  
  
"So, Bialar...am I pronouncing your name correctly?" Jury asked politely.  
  
Crais nodded sharply. Jury breathed a silent sigh of relief. "That's quite an unusual name, isn't it?" he asked.  
  
"It is usual among my species."  
  
"Of course," Jury said, with only a brief pause in which he decided he couldn't have heard what he thought he'd heard. "So, Bialar, please tell us your story."  
  
Crais shifted slightly in his seat, wondering why he was going to tell all these humans about his problems. "My daughter Raylani...has a child by a man named Braca," he began.  
  
Jury nodded sympathetically. "And you don't like him very much, do you?"  
  
"No," Crais said shortly, irritated at being interrupted.  
  
"And why is that?"  
  
"He once served as my second-in-command while I was a member of the Peacekeepers...."  
  
"The Peacekeepers? A military organisation?" Jury asked, his brow furrowing.  
  
"Yes," Crais said, more irritated this time. "And when it looked as though I was losing power, he immediately supported the...creature...who stole my command and betrayed me. Since then he has made it quite clear that he despises me and considers me a traitor."  
  
"A traitor? To what?" Jury asked, sensing an opening.  
  
"To the Peacekeepers, to what I was taught."  
  
Jury nodded, as if deep in thought. "Tell us about his relationship with your daughter."  
  
Crais' face darkened. "It seems they recreated together while she was living on the base with him."  
  
"Recreated meaning...they slept together?"  
  
Crais sighed in irritation and disgust. "If they had been sleeping I would not be here today!"  
  
The audience laughed appreciatively. Crais glared at them. "This is not a laughing matter!" he thundered.  
  
"Of course not," Jury said hurriedly. He quickly glanced up to the booth at the back of the studio, where the in-house psychiatrist and his pharmacy lived. (It was astonishing how many of his guests needed to be put on medication. At first the 5% cut the doctor had offered hadn't seemed enough, but the studio had made a small fortune already. It had been one of Jury's better ideas). The doctor made a 'so-so' gesture, Jury nodded back. "And now...you have a grandson called Marlin. Can we get a picture of him?"  
  
A picture of Marlin looking extra cute flashed up on the screen behind Crais.   
  
"Awwwwww," the audience crooned as one. The ones in the front row shut up quickly when they saw Crais giving them the evil eye.  
  
"And you have accepted him into your family?" Jury said.  
  
"He is my grandson, I have no intention of rejecting him," Crais answered firmly.  
  
The audience gave their first round of spontaneous applause. Crais stared at them, wondering what form of mind control these humans were under.  
  
"But now...the situation has changed, hasn't it?" Jury added, trying to sound caring, thinking bitterly that this guy was getting more applause than he had.   
  
"Indeed."  
  
"Tell us about it."  
  
"The...Captain Braca...."  
  
"We only use first names here," Jury broke in quickly. "To protect privacy."  
  
Crais' you-cannot-be-serious look flashed across his face. Closing his eyes for a moment and steeling himself, he forced himself to start again.  
  
"...Llyn," he said, mentally promising himself that he could kill Jury for making him utter that name, "has now...been forced to leave the Peacekeepers and is currently in residence aboard my ship."  
  
The audience gasped, happy for a twist.  
  
"And..." Crais said, forcing the words out, "my daughter is...involved with him again."  
  
A rumble of disapproval echoed through the studio. Crais started to feel a little better about being there.  
  
"And how does that make you feel?" Jury asked, doing his best counsellor expression.  
  
"I wish," Crais said, his expression stony, "to torture him in the Aurora Chair until he is barely conscious, shoot him and then let him bleed slowly to death."  
  
The audience gasped again. Jury wiped his forehead on his sleeve. "Can we edit that bit?" he muttered to himself.  
  
"Okay," he said out loud, trying to continue sounding up-beat. "Let's meet your daughter...Raylani."  
  
Raylani came out on stage to join Crais. Her reception varied between applause and boos. She glared at the people in front, who hushed quickly, sincerely regretting their choice of seats.  
  
"So, Raylani...another unusual name...tell us your side of the story."  
  
Raylani shrugged, her arms crossed over her chest. "What my father told you is about right."  
  
"Then let's talk more about your relationship with your boyfriend," Jury said. "How long were the two of you sleeping together?"  
  
"Well, we only slept together once," Raylani said, mystified as to why he wanted to know that.  
  
"So your son...was just the result of one night?" Jury said. "Bialar...couldn't you forgive that?"  
  
Raylani laughed. "I said we only slept together once. We recreated...well," she said, giving Crais a quick glance, "more than once."  
  
"Okay, I'm guessing that English is not your first language, so I'll try to keep my words simple," Jury said, tugging at his collar. "Do you love him?"  
  
Raylani shifted uncomfortably, remembering that Braca was backstage and that Crais was beside her. "I...I know that it's not just...recreation. Maybe it's love, I'm not sure."  
  
"You cannot possibly love Braca!" Crais exclaimed.   
  
"Remember, first names," Jury said. Raylani and Crais both shot him dark looks, Jury nervously took a step backwards and nearly tripped on the stairs.  
  
"He's done nothing worse than you!" Raylani shot back. "And my mother loves you. The only reason you hate Braca is because he decided to support Scorpius instead of you. He knew that you were going down so he tried to save himself. You of all people should understand that!"  
  
"I think we need to meet your mother," Jury said, seeing the show spinning out of his control and trying desperately to hold on. "Please welcome...Carma."  
  
Carma stepped up onto the stage with some difficulty. Crais rose to help her to her seat. The audience cheered her happily.  
  
"I see another complication," Jury said, indicating Carma's stomach. "Raylani...does it bother you that you will be a big sister after so long?"  
  
Raylani shrugged. "Not really. Our kids can play together."  
  
Jury gave up on that line and tried again. "Carma, how do you feel about Raylani's boyfriend...Llyn, isn't it? Sounds Welsh."  
  
"Welsh?" Carma asked, looking confused. "Whatever...I know him too. I don't have the same history with him as Bialar does so I don't mind as much. I'll admit that his past isn't rosy, but Raylani is right that I accepted Bialar's - which is far worse."  
  
"So you are prepared to accept this relationship?" Jury asked, thankful to have at least one good guy.  
  
"What choice do I have?" Carma said. "He's the father of my grandchild. As long as he doesn't hurt Raylani, I'll support them."  
  
"And if he ever did?"  
  
"I'd kill him," Carma replied, calmly. "Except that Bialar would probably get there first."  
  
Jury tugged at his collar again, the boys in the editing room were going to love this one.  
  
"Okay," he said nervously. "I think we need to meet Llyn. Come on out."  
  
Braca walked onto the stage. The audience booed him lustily. He looked as nervous as Jury felt as he settled himself into the chair beside Raylani, as far away from Crais as possible.  
  
"So Llyn," Jury said, fervently hoping that they could get through this one without a successful murder (attempted ones were good for ratings). "Would you tell us, in your own words, what made you pursue Raylani in the first place? Did you know who her father was?"  
  
"I knew," Braca answered. "I thought it would be a good way to...get revenge on Crais."  
  
The audience gasped again. "I'm assuming you mean Bialar," Jury said, trying to keep the no-last-names rule going. He turned to Raylani. "You don't look surprised by that."  
  
She looked at him like he was mad. "Of course not," she said. "Like I said, it was just recreation then, he was the only one not in the betting pool."  
  
"Betting pool?" Crais and Carma asked in unison.  
  
"Can you explain that Raylani?" Jury asked.  
  
"My mother told me I shouldn't get involved with any Peacekeepers while I was living on the base. I refused everyone, so they started a betting pool to see who could get me into bed first. Llyn was the only one not in it. Besides...I found him attractive."  
  
Carma looked shocked, Crais looked outraged, Braca looked flattered.  
  
"Okay, we have a question," Jury said, moving over to hold the microphone in front of the man in the row nearest to him. "What's your name?"  
  
"It's John," Crichton said. "Hi Jerry...oops, I mean Jury."  
  
Jury frowned. "What is your question?" he asked.  
  
"Okay, here's what I want to know," Crichton said. "Why didn't you tell me that Braca...Llyn...was the father? I wouldn't have told Crais, you know and I could have helped you."  
  
Jury looked confused. "It sounds like you know this family?" he said.  
  
"I do," Crichton said. "I'm practically Marlin's godfather, I took care of Raylani while she was pregnant and we were trying to find Crais...Bialar...again."  
  
Jury pulled at his collar. "You're not supposed to be in the audience, you should be backstage."  
  
"But I wanted to watch," Crichton protested. "Raylani, why didn't you tell me?"  
  
"I...didn't think you'd understand either," Raylani said quietly.  
  
"Well, it was a bit of a shock," Crichton said. "But I can live with it. If your mom could fall for Crais anything's possible."  
  
Crais gave Crichton a dirty look.  
  
"And maybe...I was ashamed," Raylani said, deliberately avoiding Braca's gaze. "I knew how much my father would disapprove of my choice and how stupid it was of me to have let myself...feel something for him."  
  
Braca looked curiously at her out of the corner of his eye.  
  
"So let me sum up," Jury said, thinking carefully. "Raylani, you meant it to be only a one-night stand, but it became more. You became pregnant and now Llyn is back in your life. Do you want him to stay?"  
  
Raylani shifted uncomfortably, conscious of her company. "If he wants," she said, trying to sound casual and failing.  
  
"Llyn, do you want to stay?" Jury asked. The audience waited with bated breath.  
  
Braca looked as uncomfortable as Raylani had a moment ago. "I...have no particular desire to leave."  
  
"And do you intend to be a father to your son?"  
  
"I...do not know much about children. I...could try."  
  
"So Bialar, are you prepared to accept Llyn into your family?"  
  
The audience leant forward in their seats, the atmosphere rife with anticipation. "I will consider it," Crais said grudgingly, his tone making it clear that that was his best offer.  
  
"Okay," Jury said, thankful they had got through it without actual bloodshed. "Ladies and gentlemen, we're almost out of time. So, it's time for my final word."  
  
He straightened himself and adopted his philosopher/God expression.  
  
"What we often forget in family arguments, is what is truly important. It's not personal disagreements, or things that have happened in the past. It's the people who will be affected by continuing these arguments. And, very often, that means the children. Every child deserves a loving family around them and we should always remember to do everything we can to insure that they have one. Thank you ladies and gentlemen and goodbye."  
  
The audience burst into applause once again and began chanting: "Jury! Jury! Jury!".  
  
At various places on Moya, Crais, Carma, Braca, Raylani and Crichton all woke at the same instant.   
  
"What the frell was that?!" 


	10. Thanks For The Memory Part 1: Never Befo...

Chapter 10: Thanks For The Memory Part 1 : Never Before The Big Game  
  
On one thing Crichton was unshakeable. He was getting married (to Aeryn, which made it even better), so he must have a stag party, regardless of the fact that every one of his male acquaintances hated at least one of the others.  
  
That was where the alcohol came in. If he could just get D'Argo, Crais, Braca and himself drunk enough, they might be able to forget that they had all sworn to kill each other at least once and behave like guys everywhere on a stag night - like loud, drunken MCPs.  
  
The theory was sound.  
  
In accordance with this plan, Crichton had acquired a stock of raslak, fellip nectar and some strange green stuff that smelt like pond weed (if it was possible to get pond weed that was 188 proof and made you drunk just by smelling it) sufficient to render an entire herd of elephants unconscious. In addition he had collected the closest thing to party hats that the uncharted territories had to offer (in fetching shades of pink and lilac), a box of some things resembling bar snacks and a pack of obscene playing cards featuring races he'd never heard of, many of which had made him wince when he'd looked at them. He'd briefly considered asking Chiana to strip for them (just to keep up the tradition), but had decided that D'Argo might react badly to anyone stuffing currency into her panties. And a drunk Luxan in hyper-rage could really put a crimp on your day.  
  
So everything was set. Now he just had to tell everyone about it.  
  
***  
  
"Crichton, you cannot be serious."  
  
"What?" Crichton said, for once prepared to plead with Crais. "C'mon man, it's a tradition on my planet. A guy hangs out with his buddies the night before his wedding and gets plastered. I can't get married without doing that!"  
  
"I was not aware that we *were* 'buddies'."  
  
Crichton moved round and grabbed Crais' shoulders to stop him turning away again. "I have a limited social circle," he said. "I can't do it by myself!"  
  
"I am very occupied at present."  
  
That was true enough. Everyone agreed that finally getting round to finding Talyn a pilot was a good idea, but what had possessed Crais to choose to go about it at the same time as his wife was due to give birth nobody knew. Carma said that he was trying to find an excuse not to be present this time. Crichton had heard a rumour that Crais had actually fainted when Raylani had been born, but he had enough sense of self-preservation never to mention it to Crais.  
  
"One evening. A couple of arns, that's all I'm asking for...plus recovery time," Crichton added. "We can wet the baby's head at the same time...a little early, but what the hell."  
  
Crais looked for a second as if he was actually going to deign to ask for an explanation of Crichton's words, but then shook it off. Nothing that came from Crichton's mind was ever good for him.  
  
He sighed. "Very well," he conceded. "I will attend."  
  
"Yes!" Crichton said, punching the air. "One down, two to go!"  
  
Then he ran out of command before Crais could work out that that meant Braca was coming too.  
  
***  
  
It was perhaps fortunate that Braca's Peacekeeper upbringing had not encouraged public displays of affection. A sideways glance on his part in Raylani's direction was enough to raise Crais' blood pressure to dangerously high levels and make him start grinding his teeth. A touch on her arm made his muscles tense like a tiger ready to pounce. Anything more would have been beyond the limits of his self control.  
  
Therefore, the prospect of spending an evening in Braca's company was rather less than appealing. He should have known that Crichton had some ulterior motive. He seemed to consider it his mission in life to fix everybody else's problems. Crais did not consider wanting to quietly dispose of Braca a problem. He was Raylani's father, even he knew that that meant he was *supposed* to hate her lover. Crais shuddered, he hated that word.  
  
However, he had a full day's work to do before then. He was supposed to be meeting the Elders to discuss Talyn's new pilot. And then there was Carma...and the child expected to make an appearance at any moment. And it was all beyond his control. He hated that too.  
  
Crais sighed and got back to work, trying to avoid thinking about that evening.  
  
***  
  
At 8 O'clock, the four men met outside Crichton's quarters. At 9 O'clock, they were drunk. At 10 O'clock they were very drunk. At 11 O'clock they were very very drunk. By midnight, there was hardly an active brain cell in the room. None of them except Crichton had gone there with the intention of getting drunk, indeed it would have been very out of character if they had, but here they were. Plastered. It was all Crichton's fault, of course, him and his frelling drinking contest. There is something about contests with your enemies that makes you do things you wouldn't normally do. Which was exactly why Crichton had begun it in the first place.  
  
When they regained consciousness the next morning, sprawled on various patches of floor in Crichton's quarters, D'Argo, Braca, Crichton and Crais were all put into bed, sobered up and lectured by ex-girlfriend, girlfriend, fiancee and wife respectively. They had, however, managed to establish two points of commonality. They all had blinding hangovers and none of them had the slightest idea what had happened the night before. Which, Crichton decided, based on his previous experience of bachelor parties, was probably just as well.  
  
***  
  
The morning after the morning after, Crichton and Aeryn set off to the nearest pleasure planet to be bonded. Crichton had initially protested that everyone should be there to watch them, until Crais explained what the ceremony involved and Carma added that it invariably ended in violence, tears or sex - none of which he particularly wanted an audience for. The rest of the crew waved them off happily. The last monen, with Aeryn's cold feet and Crichton's obsessions over human traditions, had been a strain and they were frankly glad to see the back of them.  
  
Crais occupied himself with helping Talyn's new pilot settle in and trying not to think about the impending birth of his second child. Her name was Aali and she was young, but capable and even-tempered and Crais, not to mention the Elders, were confident that she would be an excellent influence on Talyn. It turned out that she was a very distant relation of Moya's pilot and the two of them had been chatting happily with Talyn and Moya ever since the connection had been made. Unlike normal leviathans, Talyn had been able to bond to Aali instantly and the two of them were getting to know each other much as Talyn and Crais had all those cycles ago.  
  
Crais sincerely regretted agreeing to attend Crichton's 'bachelor party' for two reasons. The first was that he couldn't remember anything that had happened between entering and leaving Crichton's quarters except for a vague idea that they had been sitting round a table doing something with grubby bits of paper and the second was that his neck was so stiff he could barely move it and he very much disliked having an injury without anyone to blame for it. It seemed to be wearing off now, but not being able to turn his head for a full solar day was something he could have done without.  
  
At the precise moment that Crais was pondering his temporary paralysis, Raylani was staring at Braca's back, looking very puzzled.  
  
"What's that?" she asked.  
  
"What's what?" Braca said.  
  
"You seem to have writing on your back," Raylani replied, moving closer to get a better look.  
  
"What does it say?" Braca asked, too bemused to say anything else.  
  
"I don't know, I can't read it. It's not in Sebacean, which suggests to me that it's either Human or Luxan and that someone wrote it at Crichton's bachelor party," Raylani said with a grin. "Makes me wonder what you four got up to."  
  
Braca was beginning to wonder that as well.  
  
***  
  
Crichton and Aeryn returned from their 'honeymoon' several days earlier than expected. Crichton was in an absolutely foul mood and Aeryn looked less than happy, although from what little they said it seemed that the ceremony had gone well. There were certainly bonding tattoos on their hands, so the cause of their mutual displeasure was a mystery.   
  
Except that, by now, three of the four attendees at Crichton's party had unexplained afflictions, although Crichton refused to explain what his actually was. They were determined to find out what had happened that night, whatever the cost.  
  
And they would have done. Except that Carma chose that moment to announce that she was in labour. 


	11. Thanks For The Memory Part 2: If I Had O...

Chapter 11: Thanks For The Memory Part 2: If I Had One Wish  
  
"Never again!" Carma screamed out the moment Crais stepped nervously into the room. "Never again, do you understand that?! I can't believe that I let you put me through this a second time! The moment this is over, I'm going to castrate you!!"  
  
Crais pulled at his collar, not entirely convinced that she was joking, as he stepped slightly closer to the bed.  
  
"Get here now!" Carma commanded, her face such a mask of barely-controlled fury that the head of Peacekeeper command herself would have obeyed her. "You are not getting out of this! It's your fault that I'm in this much pain, the least you can do is stay and help me!"  
  
Crais stepped nearer. The moment he was close enough, Carma propped herself up on her elbow and grabbed a fist-full of the front of his jacket. "I hate you!" she yelled. "I never want to see you again, you bastard! Owwww, oh frell, Joooool!"  
  
Jool, with the air of calm superiority that she always had when dealing with anything medical, moved back to her side and swiftly gave Carma the injection she had been preparing. Crais usually found Jool's super-doctor aura irritating, but just now it was strangely comforting that one person in the room knew what they were doing.  
  
Carma slumped back on the medibed, controlling the short, shallow breaths that were supposed to ease her contractions. She'd already been in labour for ten arns and Crais had spent that time finding every excuse he could think of to stay out of the delivery room. There was, in fact, a certain element of truth in the story Crichton had heard about him fainting and he had no intention of repeating that humiliation. Carma, however, had other ideas.  
  
***  
  
"Crichton?" Braca asked, suddenly feeling that facing Peacekeeper high command would be better than asking the unusually moody Crichton what the writing on his back said.  
  
"What?" Crichton said, his tone impatient and non too inviting.  
  
"There is...I seem to have acquired some...writing, on my back. I believe that you may have been the one to write it. I wondered," Braca said, closing his eyes, unable to believe that he was asking this, "if you would mind telling me what it says?"  
  
Crichton gave him a look that wouldn't have seemed out of place on Crais' face. "You want me to read what's on your back?" he asked, in an incredulous tone.  
  
"Yes," Braca answered, suddenly very interested in the wall.  
  
Crichton gave a long-suffering sigh. "Fine, strip," he said, in a martyr-like tone.  
  
Feeling more awkward than he ever had in his life before, Braca turned and pulled off his jacket and T-shirt, praying to Gods he'd only heard of a few monens ago that no one would come in.  
  
Crichton read what was on Braca's back. His lips twisted up in a not-entirely-nice smile, his first since he and Aeryn had returned.   
  
"Is it Human?" Braca asked, feeling thoroughly exposed.  
  
"Yup," Crichton said, his grin slowly growing, his eyes glittering in sadistic glee.  
  
"Can you read it? What does it say?" Braca asked, quickly pulling his garments back on.  
  
"Sure can," Crichton said, turning to leave the room, still grinning to himself as Braca waited. He tossed his response over his shoulder as he walked through the doorway.  
  
"It says 'Kick Me'."  
  
***  
  
"Okay Talyn," Raylani said, sitting down in command and adopting a conspiratorial tone. "Now, I know that you have vid-cameras in Crichton's quarters."  
  
Talyn made outraged sounds.  
  
"Don't try to deny it. I know that you do," Raylani said firmly. "So, I would like to know...what happened at Crichton's party." She grinned, it had taken all her self-control not to laugh and give away that she understood some English, "and why Braca has 'kick me' written on his back."  
  
Talyn gave a series of chirps that sounded suspiciously like laughter.  
  
"Besides," Raylani continued. "They are desperate to know what went on, they don't remember a thing and I'd like to know first." She gave a wicked grin. "Maybe I can spice it up if it's not interesting enough."  
  
Talyn gave a reproachful chirp.  
  
"Don't lecture me, young man," Raylani said. "It's very wrong to spy on people, you know that? Next thing you'll tell me that you've been watching me and Llyn."  
  
Talyn was oddly silent.   
  
"Ewww, Talyn!" Raylani exclaimed. "Okay, bad topic, I'll forget you said that...or didn't say that. Just make me a vid-chip of this and we'll call it even."  
  
Talyn flashed his lights once. Done.  
  
A short time later, Raylani sat in her quarters, shoulders shaking with laughter. This certainly explained a few things.  
  
***  
  
"Crais, outside a moment," Jool said. Crais obeyed, for once eager to have someone else take control.  
  
She followed him out, letting the door shut behind them.   
  
"I'm concerned," she said.  
  
Crais started to feel woozy. "Concerned...how?" he asked, struggling to stay calm.  
  
Jool shook her head. Her strawberry-blond curls bounced around her face. "She hasn't made as much progress as I would like," she said. "I worried that this might not be a normal birth."  
  
"What can you do?" Crais asked hoarsely, fearing that the nightmare he'd had all through Carma's pregnancy was about to come true.  
  
Jool looked helplessly at him. "Nothing," she said. "Normally I'd remove the child surgically, but she'd lose a lot of blood and we don't have any reserves. If she can't do it on her own...."  
  
She left it unsaid, but Crais understood. His face went a murky shade of grey. Suddenly he had a brief flash of hope.  
  
"Raylani!" he blurted out. "Could she be a compatible donor?"  
  
Jool immediately hit her comms. "Raylani, come to the medilab immediately."  
  
"Coming," was the reply.  
  
***  
  
"Crais," Crichton said, looking serious now as Crais came in. "What's happening?"  
  
Crais sat down, struggling to maintain his composure. "Raylani...is a compatible blood donor, but I shall have to wait to see if the operation will be a success."  
  
Crichton nodded, there wasn't much he could say. "Jool ask you to leave?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
Braca stood to one side, feeling awkward again. This was just one of the millions of situations that Peacekeeper training hadn't prepared him for.  
  
Crichton held up a vid-chip. "Raylani gave me this before she went in. Apparently Talyn left his video cameras on and got the whole thing. You want to find out what happened? It least it'll help pass the time."  
  
Crais nodded, any distraction was welcome at this point.  
  
***  
  
"What's the matter, Braca?" Crichton laughed at the expression on Braca's face. "I bet you've got a really embarrassing tattoo, haven't you? Something like 'I love my mommy'? Except Peacekeepers don't have them, do they?"  
  
"Crichton, this is a ridiculous idea," a still-fairly-sober Crais said firmly.  
  
"This is my goddam bachelor party!" a very-drunk Crichton said. "And I say we play strip-poker. It's traditional. So you can either take your clothes off or I'll undress you myself!"  
  
In this state, none of the other men were willing to risk the possibility that he might be serious.  
  
"We need," Crichton pronounced, jamming his lilac party hat further on his head, "more booze."  
  
He looked down at his supply and grabbed the bottle with the pond weed mixture in it. It took several tries, his hand-to-eye co-ordination having deteriorated somewhat in the last two arns, but he got it eventually.  
  
"More booze!" he said triumphantly. Crais removed the bottle from his grasp before he could spill it everywhere and filled up their cups himself. Really he was starting to feel better about this whole idea, although that was mainly the result of the raslak.  
  
He and Crichton threw theirs down in one gulp, D'Argo regarded it suspiciously. Braca took an experimental sniff and jerked backwards as his eyes began to water.  
  
"What is this?" he asked.  
  
"Let's see, the guy I got it from said it's like medicinal alcohol," Crichton said cheerfully.   
  
"Did he tell you a name?" D'Argo asked, his suspicion growing.  
  
"Yeah, linthek," Crichton replied happily, taking another gulp.  
  
D'Argo began to laugh.  
  
"Hey man, what's so funny?" Crichton asked in confusion. "It's my party and I'll cry if I want to - but you're not allowed to laugh at me."  
  
"Linthek is not meant to be drunk Crichton, it's meant to be injected," D'Argo said, barely suppressing his laughter.  
  
"Oh," Crichton said, eyeing the bottle. "Ah, who cares, it's good strong stuff."  
  
He and Crais both took another mouthful.  
  
"It's used to treat erectile disfunction."  
  
Crichton spat out his mouthful, Crais accidentally got his straight down his windpipe.  
  
"What?" Crais wheezed, coughing violently.  
  
"What?" Crichton said, at the same time. "No, no you've got to be kidding me."  
  
Braca, suddenly very grateful for his hesitation, started to laugh.  
  
"I'm afraid not John," D'Argo said, picking up a bottle of raslak and grinning at his friend.  
  
"So...er...I'm gonna get...oh, man! All I asked for was some good strong booze and the guy sold me liquid frelling viagra!"  
  
"Like the Luxan said," Braca said, laughing, too drunk to care that he was about three seconds away from death, "it's not meant to be ingested. It could do anything."  
  
"How long does it take to kick in?" Crichton asked in disbelief.  
  
"Well," D'Argo said, "usually it would only take a few microts. But people don't usually drink it. Especially not in that quantity."  
  
"Oh man, so any minute now I'm either gonna have to kick you out for some private time or I could just keel over and die and...Crais?"  
  
Crais did not look well. His face had taken on a rather...well...*stiff* expression.  
  
"Crichton," he muttered. "I can't...move my head."  
  
That finished D'Argo and Braca off. They collapsed on the floor, laughing hysterically. Crichton started to grin as well as he realised that he was not similarly afflicted. Crais glared as well as he could when he could barely use the muscles in his face.  
  
***  
  
Present-day Crichton was not laughing. The lines of tension around his mouth and across his forehead had suddenly deepened by another fathom. Crais, his lingering stiff neck now explained, glanced over at Crichton. Suddenly his bad mood made some kind of sense. D'Argo got there first.  
  
"I take it that...it had the opposite effect in your case," he said, trying not to laugh.  
  
"Not talking about it," Crichton said flatly.  
  
"I'll dispose of the supply later," Crais said, carefully controlling his features.  
  
"Not yet," Crichton said, glaring at Braca and D'Argo. "I'm gonna put some in your breakfast cereal for laughing at me! It's not my fault that these stupid translator microbes don't work properly. When I said that I wanted stuff to keep us going all night, I meant quantity!!"  
  
Even Crais managed a smile at that, enjoying a brief moment free from worry.  
  
Crichton stopped the playback there. "I think we've seen enough," he said. "How long does that stuff take to wear off?"  
  
"Apparently it takes longer when taken orally," Crais replied, stretching out his sore neck. "I cannot imagine that it is designed to last for more than a few arns."  
  
Crichton sighed. "Well, it's official, no more bachelor parties. Aeryn'll be pleased."  
  
***  
  
Crais was sitting outside the door of the medilab, all thoughts of mirth and discomfort forgotten. Nothing, no word. He should go in to see if he could help, but he was paralysed. Behind that door, his wife and child could be dying.  
  
The door opened quietly and Raylani came out. Crais scrambled to his feet, uncharacteristically off-guard.  
  
"You can come in now," she said, looking a little pale but otherwise her usual self.  
  
Crais followed her, too scared of the answer to ask what had happened. His fears were quickly laid to rest by the sight of Carma sitting up on the medibed. She looked tired and worn, but happy and proud. He moved to her bedside and looked down at the bundle in her arms.  
  
Dark hair, dark eyes, a good solid face, the beginnings of a strong chin and full lips. Like father, like son.  
  
"Isn't he beautiful?" Carma said, her eyes glowing softly. "I can't think who he reminds me of...."  
  
Jool and Raylani made a hasty exit, leaving the parents to welcome their new arrival.   
  
"Are you all right?" Crais asked, his heart ready to burst with pride.  
  
"I'm fine, but no more," Carma said. "Or I may make good my promise to castrate you."  
  
Crais grinned at her, too happy and relieved to worry about it. "I will do what I can to prevent it."  
  
Carma looked from husband to son, noting the resemblance once again. "What shall we call him?" she asked softly.  
  
"My first thought was Tauvo, but...I have changed my mind. No one can replace my brother and he should not have to try. I would prefer a different name."  
  
Carma bit her lip. "I've been thinking too...and I do have one suggestion. I'm not sure if you will agree though."  
  
"What is it?" Crais asked, thinking that he could accept just about anything in his gratitude that she was still alive.  
  
"I was thinking," Carma said, her face breaking into a grin. "That we might call him...John."  
  
"John?" Crais asked, in disbelief.  
  
"Yes," Carma replied, grinning wider at Crais' reaction. "I rather like the name."  
  
Crais remained silent for a microt.  
  
"On one condition," he said.  
  
"Name it."  
  
"*You* will tell Crichton."  
  
Carma laughed. "Done." 


	12. Epilogue: And they all lived happily eve...

Epilogue: And they all lived happily ever after  
  
John Crichton sat in Talyn's command, with Marlin Crais in one arm and John Crais in the other and decided that he had to get Aeryn pregnant a.s.a.p. Aeyrn stood behind him, knowing what he was thinking and debating whether or not to tell him that he had already succeeded.  
  
Talyn and Aali chatted happily, content in the knowledge that they and their occupants were happy and healthy.  
  
Bialar and Carma Crais stood on Talyn's terrace, staring out at the stars, wound in each other's arms.  
  
Raylani and Braca said quick goodbyes and disappeared off in Aeryn's borrowed prowler, not telling anyone where they were going.  
  
All in all, John Crais decided, he had a pretty wonderful family. 


End file.
